“The only way is to send me away,” I repeated quietly. “What danger could I possibly face in the cities that I haven’t already encountered here?” I paused for a second, feeling unaccountably emotional. I blamed the drugs. “I’m so tired of living with conflict. I deserve to have my own life. I don’t belong here.” I picked at nonexistent lint on my pants. “I’m sure I never did.”
“Jessica, you don’t understand how the supernatural community works,” my father growled, turning to face me. “They are extremely powerful and they will be curious about a female born to a werewolf. I can’t allow it. It’s too full of unknowns, dangerous beings with deadly skills, any of which could kill you. You are human and I can’t possibly prepare you for everything you may encounter, and even if I could, it would be useless. You are no match for them.”
“Then I won’t go as myself.” I shrugged. “I can leave here as anybody. Nobody knows my face except for the wolves up here. I’m willing to start over and live in secrecy if it gets me out of here. I will do whatever you ask of me—I will be safe, keep my head down, and follow your rules. I swear.” That would be new for me, but I was willing to try.
“That may work, Callum,” James said carefully. “We have the ability to give her an alias, a brand-new identity. We do it all the time for Pack wolves who relocate.” Werewolves don’t age normally, and over time people start to notice. “She can leave here freely if no one knows who she is. She doesn’t smell like us, and there are no other traits that would give her away.”
“Yes,” I agreed. “Nobody has ever seen me in your company, as the Alpha’s daughter. They don’t know what I look like. They only have my name.”
“I don’t like it.” My father ran a hand through his hair. “The wolves here know you. They can find you. Word can spread to other Packs.”
“Then”—I grappled for an answer—“we’ll tell them I’ve left the country. They won’t bother looking for me if they think I’m gone for good. Or we can pretend I died—we can fake my death.”
“It’s not that easy, Jessica,” my father said stubbornly. “There are other factors involved.”
“What other factors can there possibly be?” I asked, exasperated. “Because those factors can’t be any worse than getting the shit kicked out of me again at the hands of one of your wolves. You have to stop being so stubborn and try to understand! Anything that happens to me in my new life will pale in comparison to what I’ve already lived through here. The brushes with violence, my constantly being surrounded by people who would rather see me dead, happen on a daily basis. I can’t keep this up. You’re going to have to let me go one way or another, and I’d rather not leave here in a body bag.”
“That’s enough!” My father stopped in front of me. “You think I don’t know what goes on right under my nose? In my own Pack? That I’m blind to what’s been happening? I’m not. And I never have been. I’ve let you and Tyler lie to me these last few months, tiptoe around, covering your bruises. And I’ve done it in an effort to save lives—just as you both have.” He walked to the windows. “I’ve ignored it for the good of the Pack, because if I killed those wolves, the Pack would’ve been torn apart already, your life in greater jeopardy.” He turned without meeting my eyes. “I’ve been the Alpha of this Pack for over five hundred years. It’s tough to understand how long that is until you’ve lasted as long as I have. Up until nineteen years ago, my leadership was cut-and-dried, my allegiance, without question, to my Pack—to my wolves. That allegiance was returned to me without hesitation. Once you were born, things changed very quickly. It took me by surprise. The intensity and love I have for you and Tyler came from somewhere deep and previously untapped. I can’t say I’ve made the best choices along the way, especially of late, but trying to maintain a fair balance to both you and this Pack has taken its toll. Everyone has suffered. I can’t protect you without sacrificing the lives of my wolves, the same wolves who have stood beside me for centuries.”
“So your threats to harm them if they touched me have been for show?”
“Of course not.” My father spun around to face me, his eyes glinting with emotion. “All of my orders about your safety have been sincere, backed with my full power. Seeing you, of your own free will, fighting Mitch in the arena, an area off-limits except for Pack challenges, must be handled carefully. I cannot step in and kill a wolf during a challenge. It’s against Pack Law. But Mitch will be lucky if he survives. At any other time during your life, if I’d personally seen any wolf abusing you, I would have killed him instantly and without regret.” He ran both hands through his thick black hair. “Recently, as the aggression increased, every scuffle was relayed back to me, and I made absolutely sure you weren’t hurt—that the outcome wasn’t severe, that Tyler or one of the other wolves had stepped in, or that the wolf himself had walked away. If that hadn’t been the case, or any of the fights had escalated too far, the wolf in question would’ve faced death at my hands.” He blew air out of his mouth, but this time it was with regret, not annoyance. “Jessica, you have to understand that violence is a way of life for us and always has been. We are animals at our core, and fighting one another for our rightful place in this world is natural. We can’t change that.” He sighed. “But if the goddamn wolves had followed my directives instead of letting a myth lead them emotionally astray, we’d all be coexisting just fine. Once you didn’t make a change at puberty, I sincerely thought the unrest surrounding you would calm. But I can see it’s only gotten worse.” He shook his head. “I don’t understand it.”
I hadn’t understood it either, but that didn’t matter. “You have to have faith in me,” I said. “That’s how we settle it. If the wolves won’t accept me, you have to let me go. I understand everything you’ve said so far, and I don’t begrudge the decisions you’ve felt you had to make for the good of Pack. In my heart I’ve always known that, and I’m not a blind innocent in all of this. I contributed in my own way, never able to walk away from strife. I will take responsibility for my mistakes, but that’s all in the past. Everything is blown wide open now. I blew it open when I challenged Mitch in the arena. I did it for a reason, and I hope he doesn’t die for my choices. He certainly would’ve attacked me at some point down the road. He’s a huge ass**le, which goes without saying, but that fight was mine. Now you have to do your part. I can’t stay here. If I do, I die. The next wolf will be stronger and smarter than Mitch. You know that Pack is better off without me. Your wolves are better off without me. We can’t coexist any longer. You have to choose.”