“When there was nothing to do at the hospital, sometimes I hung out in the neonatal unit,” Quentin told Sarah self-righteously. She started forward and suppressed a scream of alarm as he gestured easily to the three of them with the arm holding Asher. “But there’s going to be trouble if it gets out that the lead singer of the Cheatin’ Hearts came to your house and held your baby up to his man-boob.”
Sarah laughed. Daniel laughed. Wendy laughed uproariously, because this was her brand of humor.
“Try holding the baby like a football—okay, you’ve never played football. This doesn’t mean anything to you. Hold the baby like you’d hold your purse if you were downtown, tucked under your arm, like this.” He laid Asher down with Wendy again. Then he turned to Daniel and said, “Let’s go make some snacks.”
Daniel stared at him, uncomprehending. “What?”
Wendy patted Daniel’s knee. “Go with him, lovah, and you can have a man-chat while I nurse.”
“No, I really make snacks,” Quentin said at the same time Sarah said, “No, he really makes snacks.”
“Oh,” Daniel said, standing up slowly. “I thought it was some Southern term for takeout on speed dial.” He followed Quentin into the kitchen.
Wendy unbuttoned her shirt and held Asher as Quentin had suggested. Asher latched on, and the wailing stopped instantly. Sarah’s ears rang in the silence.
“I think the baby was hungry,” Wendy said. She caught Sarah staring. “I scoff at your cle**age. You and that Erin chick don’t have anything on me.”
In her amazement at Wendy, Asher, and Quentin, Sarah had forgotten all about Erin. She should never forget Erin, she scolded herself.
Wendy gazed down at Asher. “It’s bizarre, isn’t it?”
“Let’s just say I’m glad you’re going first.”
“This is so great,” Wendy said. “Quiet. Contentment. You don’t understand what I’ve been through. Well, yes you do. Picture that screaming nonstop for seventy-two hours. I would feed him and feed him and feed him and take him off and he’d be screaming again in fifteen minutes. Poor baby! It’s so much easier on him now. I can feel it working better. What’s up with your boyfriend the lactation consultant?”
“Hell if I know. He also plays bridge and speaks Hindi.”
“Nice piece of ass, too.”
Sarah grinned. “We shouldn’t curse around the baby.”
“Oh yeah, the baby,” Wendy said. She looked down at Asher again and smiled serenely. “Sometimes when I hold him, the most wonderful, peaceful feeling comes over me, like in a made-for-TV movie on the Lifetime channel. But then . . . I don’t know. I feel like I’m a milk machine and there’s nothing left of what I used to be.”
Wendy seemed the same to Sarah. “Tell me about the breast-feeding. Do you feel orgasmic, like we read in the Lactation League book?”
“Not so much orgasmic. More nauseated.”
“Really,” Sarah said, disappointed. “Well, it’s only day four.”
“It’s day four,” Wendy agreed, much calmer now that the baby was calm. “Enough about me and my life-altering event. What about you? Have you had word from the unsinkable Mr. Fawn?”
Sarah flared her nostrils in distaste. “He’s supposed to drop off some papers at my apartment.”
“Aw, I think it’s so sweet the dickhead wants you back. He called here yesterday to find out whether you were coming to town to see the baby. And oh yeah, by the way, to wish me joy. This new cowboy is infinitely more fun. He’s so cheerful.”
“Like Ernie on Sesame Street.”
“No, not like that at all.” Wendy stroked Asher’s hair absently, motherly. “I got a call from Archie just now. Stargazer’s very pleased to hear you got the Cheatin’ Hearts’ album out of them. You’re off the hook for the Nine Lives fiasco, as long as you don’t screw anything else up.”
“There’s the rub.”
“I also got a call from one of my contacts at Manhattan Music. He said your cowboy propositioned an old lady down in Payroll, then stood on a desk and serenaded a girl in Foreign Rights.”
Sarah swallowed. “Oh, I hadn’t heard that. We did lose track of him for a while.”
“Was he—” Wendy touched her nose: cocaine.
Sarah shook her head. “No, he’s just like that. Get this. The Cheatin’ Hearts were telling the truth about him all along. He’s really not a drug addict.”
Wendy looked at her skeptically.
“That’s what I thought at first.” Sarah nodded. “We have no further comment.” This was Sarah and Wendy’s code phrase for I have to keep my act’s secrets, but I will dish everything when we turn fifty.
Wendy’s eyes widened. “Then what’s stopping you? You get some, do you understand me? Get some for me—indeed, for sexless new mothers everywhere!” The passion was intact, but the loud voice and wild gestures she normally would have used were toned down out of deference to Asher. Even their boss, Archie, hadn’t been able to make Wendy stop shouting in the office. This was to be the first of the baby’s many amazing feats.
Sarah said sadly, “I don’t think I’m getting any.”
“What do you mean, you don’t think you’re getting any?”
Sarah shrugged. “Like I said yesterday, he acted weird after I made him come. I think he’s still in love with Erin.”
“Are you listening to this?” Wendy asked Asher. She looked back at Sarah. “Surely you don’t believe that, after he came to New York with you.”
“I just wouldn’t count on it, Wendy.”
“But I am counting on it!” Wendy cried. “The thought of you having fun sustains me, and if I didn’t have that, I’m not sure I could get through this.”
“Oh, Wendy,” Sarah said, putting an arm around her friend. “It’s a huge adjustment. The biggest. You’ll get the hang of it. I’ll come babysit. More country music stars will drop by to give you child care tips. And have you seen the way Daniel looks at you?”
Wendy shook her head, but she gazed at Sarah with new hope.
Sarah patted Wendy’s hand. “Heal up quick.”
As if in answer, Daniel’s hushed voice filtered in from the kitchen, then Quentin’s soft chuckle. Daniel appeared in the doorway. He gazed at Wendy nursing Asher for a moment. Wendy gazed placidly back. Then he rounded the end of the sofa and bent toward her. She turned her head, offering her cheek for a kiss. A peck on the cheek wasn’t what Daniel had in mind. He cupped her chin in one hand, turned her face to him, and kissed her deeply on the lips.