"He's shown us some of what he can do already."
"How will he find them?" Each question cut him off from one more avenue of retreat.
"They are all marked, or tagged, by the HFZ event. Each man. Each woman. He will find them through the doors, and we will return to Ambergris triumphant."
A strange light had entered her eyes. Like someone who had been dreaming of something that they'd never thought could happen. And now it was happening.
"What if they kill me? Eat my memories?" Finch asked. "What then?"
The Lady in Blue turned the full force of her gaze on him. "What's really bothering you, Finch? Is it fear? Or is it something else?" She turned to look out at the desert again. "Those things out there," she murmured. "They're gray caps, and they're people. Combined. How? I don't know. Maybe they came here during the Silence. Possible. But even though I don't know, I understand. Because we're changing, too, Finch. There's no one under my command who hasn't been altered in some way. The question is how much you change. Change too much and you're no different from Shriek, no different from a gray cap. And then even if we win, we lose. But adapt just enough? That's what I need from you. To adapt just enough."
An answer for everything. Yet Finch knew he'd always be searching for the next question. He felt a hundred years old. Like the weight of everything had piled on his back at once.
"What if I say no? What if I want you to just leave me the f**k alone?" Stop fighting, some part of him advised. Just fall into it and keep falling. But he couldn't. Not yet.
The Lady in Blue sighed. "You know, it's no good for the Kalif, either, if the gray caps come through. I don't care who you are or aren't working for. I don't care about your father's spying. I just know you hate Partials and your father had no love for the gray caps."
"How are you going to protect me?"
"We can't protect you. But we can make sure you don't get caught."
"You mean you can kill me." Feeling ill. Realized that in some ways the Lady in Blue was no different than Stark. Apply pressure. Squeeze. Get what you want.
The Lady in Blue looked somehow both stern and compassionate. In a quiet voice, she said, "I mean you know too much, John Finch. Sometimes we have to take the cards we're dealt and make the most of them. You can't throw away the cards now-you've already looked at them."
There it was. Stated directly. Somehow Finch admired her more for it. A bitter laugh of appreciation as he stood there, facing her down.
"So I have no choice."
"If it's any consolation, maybe you never had a choice. Maybe there was never a point at which you could have turned back." She had the good grace to look away as she said, "Our man will be in touch when the time comes."
Finch anticipated the needle a second before it entered his neck.
When they released Finch back into the crowd at the black market party, everything was different. The sound soared over him at first. Then it was as if he couldn't hear it anymore. Looked for Sintra but didn't see her. Looked for Bosun but didn't see him, either. Didn't know how much time had passed. But the band was taking a break.
An urgency to the night, but he'd brought it with him. Couldn't get the image of the Lady in Blue out of his head. On a hill. In a boat. At the wall of the fortress. The images stabbed at him, threatened madness. What didn't she tell me?
Finch crossed the room on unsteady legs. Wary of Bosun. But still no Bosun. Felt for his Lewden Special. Relief. It had been returned to him.
Made his way through corridors. Gaze unfocused. Seeing nothing. Out into the rain. The towers a steamy green above the tops of buildings. The street nearly empty.
Two steps onto the street and he met an immovable force. Bosun, appearing out of darkness. Pulling his right arm behind him. Inexorable, the man all muscle. Felt Bosun's other hand looking for his gun. Felt it taken. Again.
Bosun's hot breath at his ear as Finch was marched toward a side alley. Helpless as a child.
"Find my carving?" Bosun muttered.
Against the discomfort, twisting, "For Truff's sake, you don't have to break my arm."
"So you didn't find it." Bosun seemed disappointed.
"What carving?" Grunting. Contorting to try to get relief.
"Stop moving. In your apartment. Left it there while we took the place apart. Would've done in your cat if he hadn't hidden."
Another mystery solved. One that didn't even matter anymore.
"Fuck you. Your breath smells like shit."
Bosun just laughed. "Be lucky if yours doesn't begin to smell like blood."
In the alley: Stark. With five other men. Bosun shoved Finch forward, releasing him.
"Finch, what a surprise!" Stark said. "I know you're just coming from a party, but we're having our own little party out here. Glad you could make it."
Bosun punched him in the gut before he could react. Fists like stone. Sent him slumped over onto the ground. Begging for air.
Got to his feet slowly, not sure if he should. Could've used Wyte coming out of the darkness in that moment.
Stark's face was a vicious half-moon in the dimness. Hard to believe Bosun was his brother.
"Where'd you go, Finch? Where'd you go for an hour and a half? Bosun says you were there and then you weren't."
The question so much smaller than the answer. Contempt for the interrogator. What kind of spymaster came in person for this kind of ambush? Only someone who'd never gotten past the simple art of the shakedown. Came in hard and fast and thought that was enough.
Not here it isn't.
Secret knowledge gave him strength. "Just enjoying the party."
Stark circled him. "I'll bet you were. Saw your exotic girl leave. She looked well satisfied. Did you give her a good time in there? You should be glad I'm a man of such refinement, Finch, or we might've given her a better one."
"Is that all you came here to say?" Finch asked.
Bosun nodded and two of his men wrenched Finch's arms back. Painfully.
"No, not really. We've some more serious matters to discuss. Like, did you know there's a bounty on the head of the Lady in Blue?" Stark came close, looked him in the eye. "I think you do know that. It applies to anyone who associates with her-on my side or yours."
"I don't know what you're talking about."
Stark nodded. Bosun punched him in the stomach again. Grunted. Fought through the pain. The thugs held him up.
"I think you do, Finch. I think you do. At least, those two thought so. Show him, boys."
They dragged him closer to the wall. Saw four pale feet, the rest of the bodies hidden by shadows.