It was one of the most elegant, elaborate dinners that I’d ever been invited to, and it was definitely the nicest thing that any guy had ever done for me. Finn’s idea of a romantic evening had been making out in one of the freezers in the back of the Pork Pit. But this . . . this was amazing, like something out of one of the rom-coms I secretly loved to watch with Sophia.
But despite my pleasure, my stomach clenched at all the trouble Sebastian had gone to for me. Or at least had his staff go to for me. Because I definitely didn’t deserve it. Not the flowers, not the tour, not the romantic dinner—not one little shred of it.
Maybe Finn and Fletcher were right. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea. Because no matter how much I wanted to pretend otherwise, the simple fact was that I had killed Sebastian’s father. And if he ever found out, he would hate me for it. How could he not? And I didn’t know if I could bear that. Not now. Not after he’d been so wonderful to me.
“Much better than dinner and a movie, don’t you think?” Sebastian said.
Somehow I swallowed down my guilt. “Much better,” I agreed. “But it’s too much. You shouldn’t have gone to all of this bother.”
He shook his head. “No, it’s not too much. You were there for me when I needed someone the other night. I wanted to thank you for that, and this was the best way I knew how.”
His eyes met mine, and I found myself drowning, drowning, drowning in his dark, sincere gaze. How did he always know exactly what to do and say to make me melt? We hadn’t known each other all that long, but it seemed like Sebastian already knew me better than anyone, even Fletcher.
Once again, my heart squeezed at how I’d hurt him, at this secret that would always stand between us, at the specter of his father that would never leave my mind.
But Sebastian didn’t seem to notice my distress. Instead, he stepped even closer and cupped my face with his hand, his skin warm and smooth against my own.
“Gin,” he whispered.
He lowered his lips to mine, my eyes fluttered closed, and I forgot about everything else except the way that he made me feel.
At least for tonight.
16
The next two weeks were some of the happiest of my life.
Sebastian and I had such a good time at dinner, laughing, talking, and getting to know each other, that he asked me to go out with him again the next night. Since I hadn’t had time to look for the file in his father’s office, I said yes.
Well, I really said yes because I wanted to see him again, but Fletcher didn’t need to know that. No one did but me.
That next night and next date turned into another night and another date, then another . . .
Sebastian and I spent as much time together as we could. Sometimes he managed to sneak away from the office long enough to come have lunch at the Pork Pit, and every evening when my shift was over, he swung by the restaurant and picked me up. Sometimes we drove around Ashland for hours, just talking. Other times, we went to the movies or some of the city’s many museums, like Briartop, where we rented a paddleboat and fed the ducks as we floated around the island. We even trekked up to Cypress Mountain one afternoon to explore the shops and sights there. I took Sebastian to my favorite hole-in-the-wall restaurants, like the Cake Walk, while he introduced me to some of Ashland’s finer dining establishments, including Underwood’s. Some nights, he drove me out to his family’s estate, and we explored the grounds hand in hand, before finding a dark, private corner and melting into each other’s arms.
Despite all my visits to the estate, I never did get any closer to finding Vaughn’s mysterious file. Oh, Sebastian took me to his father’s office in the library several times, but he never left me alone long enough for me to search for the file. And after a while, I didn’t care about finding it anymore. Vaughn was dead. He couldn’t hurt Charlotte anymore. Nothing else mattered.
Except for Sebastian.
With every word, every date, every soft kiss and sweet caress, I fell harder and harder for him. He was just so good to me, so kind, thoughtful, and considerate, and so focused on doing whatever he thought would make me happy, whether it was bringing me more roses, buying me a jumbo cookie at a sweets shop, or telling a bad joke to make me laugh after a rotten day at the restaurant. I’d spent so much time creeping around in the shadows that I loved having someone’s unwavering focus and undivided attention, like being with me was the highlight of his day. The thing that he looked forward to whenever we were apart.
The only thing that mattered.
Of course, Finn didn’t approve of my new relationship, but I ignored his snide quips and comments. He was simply being an annoying, egotistical pest, like always. Fletcher wasn’t happy about my involvement with Sebastian either, but he didn’t give me any more dire warnings to stay away from him. Still, I could see the disapproval in the old man’s eyes. That was something else that I ignored, although it was harder than it was with Finn.
But it was worth it, because for the first time in a long time, I was actually . . . happy.
Oh, I’d never been unhappy, not with Fletcher and especially not learning how to be the Spider. Training with the old man had always made me feel smart and strong and powerful, made me forget the scared little girl I’d been, living on the streets, and especially made me feel like I was in control of my own life, my own fate, my own destiny. Like I could do anything, overcome anything, survive anything.
But being with Sebastian made me feel alive in a way that I thought had died the night my family was murdered. I felt like a different person when I was with him, like I really was a simple waitress who was going out with a great guy. When I was with Sebastian, I could forget about all of the bad stuff that had happened to me, and I could just be in the moment with him. Talking, laughing, kissing, canoodling. Things were going so well between us that I even allowed myself to have silly, stupid, romantic daydreams about the future, about our future together.
The only thing that ruined my happiness was the fact—the cold, hard, inescapable fact—that I’d killed Cesar Vaughn.
The job hadn’t been any different from any other that I’d done. Really, it had been far easier than most. I’d never lost sleep over being an assassin before, but try as I might, I just couldn’t shake Vaughn. More than once, I dreamed about stabbing him in his office and his final gasps for breath with Charlotte’s name on his lips. I still didn’t know what to make of that. But the really bizarre thing was that they weren’t even dreams so much as memories of that night that I kept reliving over and over again every time I closed my eyes. Something that I hadn’t done since my family had been murdered.