“Ready?” I ask Steve. He nods. As we exit, I turn back to Jake. “You’re going to regret keeping them apart for so long. There’s no one more decent than Kaga. He’d do right by your sister.”
Jake’s mouth tightens, but he says nothing.
“Where to?” Steve asks as we climb into the Bentley.
“Office. I’ll change there.”
“What will you do about Howe?”
“It’s time to ratchet up the pressure, not just in his social life.”
Despite the appearance of Mitch Hedder, the attack was most likely orchestrated by Richard in response to the first round of pressure. If he was behind the assault, though, it meant direct and swift action must be taken. Not just for my sake but for Tiny’s.
In the office, changed and prepared for a full day of analyst reviews and meetings, I call Tiny to give her the rundown on what happened this morning.
“He wouldn’t talk. We’re letting him stew for a few more hours and then releasing him. Jake’s got a guy who’ll follow him for a couple of days.”
“You didn’t hit him or anything?”
“No, Tiny, I did not. You’ll be happy to hear my lawyer was there, so I was extra circumspect.”
She sighs with relief. “I just don’t want you hurt. Your eye looked terrible this morning. What will you tell people?”
“That I didn’t duck quickly enough at the gym during a sparring session.”
“You spar?”
“A little, although not as much as I did in the past. I had my share of fighting when I was young and dumb. I prefer to fight in a suit with a lot of cash. It’s less painful and a lot more rewarding. Plus, if you get beat up, it’s hard to make love to your girlfriend.”
“Really? Because you had no problems last night,” she said.
“Keep talking like that and we’re going to have lunch early.”
“Speaking of lunch, I’m going to cancel on you. Sarah called.”
I shouldn’t begrudge the time she spends trying to repair past relationships. I shouldn’t, but I do. I take a moment so my next words to her show no evidence of my true feelings. “That’s fine. I’ll see you at home tonight.”
“Love you, Ian,” she says. And then I hear a door slam. “Hi, Jake.” A grunt of a response and then another door slam.
“Wow, he’s a bear this morning.”
Undoubtedly. “Take an early lunch today. Stay out of his hair.”
“What’s this about?” she asks suspiciously.
“Nothing to do with you or me. He and Kaga had an argument this morning.”
“Okay. Love you,” she repeats.
“Love you too.”
My next call is to Jake. “We’re letting him out at eleven.”
“I’ll have a man over there fifteen minutes prior.”
“Just have him observe and deliver the usual. Name, occupation, associates. We should be able to figure out who his brother is.”
“You think it’s Howe?” he asks.
“I do. I called him a few days ago and told him that it was time for him to go.”
“You did?” He sounds surprised but pleased. “It’s a good time. Out with the garbage before you start something new. Of course, you had to enjoy knowing you could crush him at any time. I can see why you’ve waited. I’ll report back on the details of our friend.”
He hangs up, but I’m left staring at the phone. You had to enjoy knowing you could crush him at any time.
Shoving away from my desk, I walk to the plate-glass windows overlooking the downtown harbor. Had I let Richard go all this time because I liked the idea that his continued existence could be snuffed out at any time with a mere phone call? Perhaps. Perhaps knowing I could make him suffer was perversely satisfying in its own way, and I used Cecilia to justify it.
Did I really care about Cecilia and her purported good deeds? Not particularly. I did enjoy knowing that I controlled Richard’s future.
But now I want him gone. Tiny is the most important thing in my world. More important than revenge and retribution. Those things will only hold me back—or worse, they’ll endanger the fragile future Tiny and I are building together.
Meeting Tiny, falling in love with her, I’ve realized that I’d rather look forward than backward. I’d rather live for tomorrow than wallow in the regret and pain of yesterday. It’s the mantra I’ve been preaching to her regularly. Her mother would want her to be happy. Her mother would want her to move on. If I expect Tiny to look ahead, then I need to as well.
It’s hard. Very hard. But I’m no longer alone.
FOURTEEN
JAKE RETURNS LATER THAT DAY with information on my assailants. The Ludwiczak brothers were smalltime criminals with rap sheets as long as my forearm. They’d been involved in everything from burglary to assaults. Both brothers had served time, but they’d been out for a couple of years. It appeared that they were offering their services as paid muscle, which Jake said could move them back into the Hedder column, but Richard is the mostly likely candidate.
The following day we take the Hedders to the gravesite in Flushing. Tiny’s father had originally been buried on the west side, but there wasn’t any space for her mother and father to be laid to rest together. With Tiny’s consent, I had her father moved to a new plot, where Sophie and Sandro Corielli would rest side-by-side.
I hired a car to transport the Hedders, and Tiny and I follow in the Bentley.
The last trip we made out to the cemetery was not together. Tiny had gotten on her bike and ridden for miles, faster and faster until her feet were nearly bloody. She’d finally collapsed on the grass at the cemetery, drained of energy.
Fear had struck me hard that day. I’d followed her as best I could in the car, but she took turns that I couldn’t and often I guessed wrong, having to backtrack and then reroute.
I thought maybe I’d lose her in those first weeks after her mother’s death. She was emotionally gone.
It was a risk, but I took her out to the Connecticut estate and told her that I loved her and wanted to spend every one of my days left with her.
She came back to me that day, but I still feel like she’s unsure about her place in my life. And I’m helpless to fix it.
The tension in the car thickens with each passing block.
“You think I’m weak, don’t you,” she says.
The color in her face is washed away, and her lips are pressed thin and tight. I don’t know if she’s angry or sad. Likely both.