“So what’re you doing?” I asked.
Friday night, I should probably have something social going on, but the first week of school, job and practicum wiped me out.
“Eating.”
“Smart-ass. You know what I mean.”
“I’ll get my bike running if it’s the last thing I do. I won’t have a chance to work on it for a while. Don’t make any plans tomorrow, by the way. The party is most definitely on.”
“Cool. Who’s coming?”
He listed a bunch of mutual friends, people we hung out with in the dorm and then some names I didn’t recognize. Bottom line, at least thirty people would be here. I had mixed feelings about it. At the best of times, I wasn’t a party animal, though I had barfed in the bushes a few times my freshman year. Ironically, on one of those occasions, I hadn’t been drinking at all; instead I’d sucked down too many energy drinks and caffeine pills cramming for midterms. Now I didn’t let myself get more than a buzz on, mostly because I hated hangovers so much. Recovery could kill the whole day.
Max was looking expectant. “Aren’t you gonna tell me how awesome I am?”
I stretched lazily. “Nope. There’s no point. You say it as part of your daily morning affirmation, anyway.”
“Can’t argue with my own mirror.” He smirked.
“Good luck with your bike.”
“Thanks.” He tousled my hair and headed out.
A glance at the clock told it wasn’t remotely late enough to sit on the balcony and expect company, so I worked on coursework for an hour and a half. After that, I lost interest in being virtuous and rummaged through my mom’s care package. She’d maximized value from flat-rate, priority shipping, as I’d also received homemade gingersnaps, a handmade scarf and a poster she thought would look nice on the living room wall.
On a whim, I dug a small basket out of my closet. I’d gotten a bath set in this, and it was light enough to serve. Next I located a ball of yarn, left over from my failed attempts to learn to knit. My mother was so good at it, and she’d tried so hard to teach me, but I never made anything that didn’t look like a cat had killed it. I threaded the string through the straw on four sides, and then let it out, guessing how long it needed to be for Ty to reach it. Finally, I tied the strands off on top, creating a messy sort of handle.
By this time, it was after eight, nearly dark. I cracked the balcony doors for a breeze; it wasn’t hot enough to run the air conditioner, and it would only get cooler from here. Through the sliding glass doors, the last of the sunlight glimmered over the treetops, like a farewell, and I watched until the shadows lengthened completely. As soon as they did, I made a cup of tea, but I was a wild woman and chose orange Ceylon spice instead of the usual infusion. I also took a pack of peanut butter cups from the Mom stash. With the doors open and ears straining, I heard when Ty stepped out.
Smiling, I lined the basket with a paper napkin, then set a tea bag atop it, along with a gingersnap and a peanut butter cup. Maybe I should’ve acted like I wasn’t waiting for him so obviously, but I had never been good at pretending I didn’t want things when I did. So I stepped out onto the balcony, maneuvered around the lounge chair and carefully lowered the basket toward him. He was just staring, as if willing me to appear. Sparks crackled to life inside me.
“What’s this?” he asked, steadying the gift drop as it came to him.
“My mom sent treats. I’m sharing them, so we’ll both have delicious things.”
To my surprise, he didn’t argue, and his smile flashed, visible in the shadows. Part of me wondered why he didn’t ask me downstairs to talk, but his reticence must relate to Sam somehow. The basket lightened when he took his share of the goodies.
Then he said, “Let me heat some water. I could use a cup of tea.”
“Sure.”
I settled into the Adirondack, waiting for him to return. Peace stole over me, along with gladness that we hadn’t gone with a place closer to campus, all full-time college students. I would never have met Ty. Because it seemed polite, I didn’t eat any sweets and only sipped at my tea, cooling on the arm of my chair. He must’ve used the microwave because it didn’t take long enough for a kettle to boil.
“Back.” The wicker love seat creaked as he settled onto it.
“Cookie first.”
In silent harmony, we devoured them. I loved the combination of sweetness and the spicy bite on the tongue afterward. I could taste the molasses, remember the scent of the kitchen while Mom was baking. A pleasant homesickness swept over me. This summer, I was so busy, saving up for lean times through the fall and winter, I hadn’t gone home at all since it was a sixteen-hour drive. I’ll make sure to see them at Thanksgiving. With any luck, the Toyota had a few more road trips in her.
“Phenomenal,” he said.
“Gingersnaps are my favorite, though at Christmas she does a peppermint-and-white-chocolate cookie that’s a serious contender.”
“Sounds like you miss your family.”
“Yeah.”
“Where are you from?”
Ah, an actual question. That means I can ask one back.
“Nebraska, toward the South Dakota and Wyoming side, if that helps.”
“I’ve never met anyone from there.”
Michigan was a long way from home. “I usually get ‘not in Nebraska anymore’ jokes, and then I have to decide if I’m going to remind them that’s Kansas or play along.”
“What do you usually do?”
“Play along.”
“You don’t like conflict, huh?” He sounded normal tonight, as if talking to me wasn’t an unpleasant chore anymore.
That was a relief since I’d come to look forward to these moments with him so much. More, maybe, than I’d like to admit. Right. Friends. I distracted myself by considering his question. “Not if it can be avoided. I’m not what you’d call pugnacious, no. But I like to think I don’t back off important issues. What about you?”
“No.” His voice was bleak and quiet. “I don’t. Even when I should.”
Wow, that took a dark turn.
If I could’ve jumped onto his patio without breaking an ankle or waking Sam, I’d have been down there like a shot. The distance between us seemed intolerable, and from the knot in my throat, I didn’t see how I could live another second without touching him, finding out if his hair was as soft as it looked or what he smelled like. I wanted him in a way I never had before.