Ismae’s words send a deep chill through me, for while most think hellequin no more than tales told to keep children from straying too far from home, we at the convent know that they are real, and that they too belong to Mortain, although they serve a different purpose than His handmaidens do. They are the tortured souls of the damned who have pledged themselves to serve Mortain in order to earn their redemption.
In the Privy Council meeting immediately after the attempt, Chancellor Crunard revealed my true identity to the others. There is much anger and confusion among the members of the court right now, along with much finger-pointing. Accusations are flying. I pray daily for Sister Vereda to See a way out of this mess. Or, at the very least, to See who is behind it so I may take action upon him.
Yours in Mortain,
Ismae Rienne
When I have finished reading, I hug the parchment to my chest and breathe deeply. Ismae is fine. She is better than fine—she has proven her worth and made the convent proud by saving our young duchess’s life. And she has been in contact with Sybella.
Close on the heels of that sweet relief comes a spurt of bitter heartbreak. I should be there with Ismae, protecting our duchess, doing our god’s work, not trapped on this island. I close my eyes and let the feeling pass through me. I have proof of the seeress’s returning skills; surely that will put a stop to this idea of the abbess’s.
I return to the table and remove the black sealing wax from the small cubbyhole where I keep it hidden. Holding it near the candle, I wait for it to melt, place two thin drops on the exact spot where Ismae’s seal was, then press the original seal into that. When it cools, it looks whole and unbroken, with no hint of anyone having tampered with it.
I slip the resealed message into my pocket, then cross over to Sister Claude. I gently remove the empty tankard from her hand and tuck the blankets closely around her old, thin body. It is time to give the abbess the good news about Sister Vereda.
As I make my way to the abbess’s chambers, a flutter of excitement rises in my chest and it is all I can do not to give a little twirl in the corridor, but I contain myself. Surely a handmaiden of Death should not feel so giddy with delight.
When I reach the abbess’s office, the door is closed. At my knock, she calls out, “Who is it?” and some part of my mind cannot help but notice this is not her customary response.
“It is Annith, Reverend Mother. Another crow arrived just after you left and I have come to bring you the message.”
“Very well, come in.”
When I open the door and enter the chamber, the abbess is just taking a seat. I dip a small curtsy, then approach her desk, the sound of my footsteps nearly silent against the crackle and snap of the fire in the hearth, a fire that does little to warm the chill in the room.
When I reach the desk, I smile—a smile I fill with every ounce of affection I have ever felt for her over the years, no matter that her recent decision threatens to undermine that. “Sister Serafina said I should let you know that Sister Vereda had two small visions this morning. They were true ones, not simply ramblings. And I bring proof.”
Her eyebrows shoot up in what she no doubt intends as surprise, but it seems to me that there is also a faint gleam of alarm in her eyes. “Indeed? And what were these visions?”
I hold out the note. “That we would receive two messages from the mainland today, and that it would be raining before noon. The first drops began to fall just as I came inside.”
The abbess’s face relaxes and she quirks her mouth. “The cook can predict the rain simply from the way her knees creak.”
“But she cannot predict the number of messages we receive,” I point out gently.
She nods her head in a reluctant gesture of agreement. Unnerved by the less-than-joyous reception of this news, I fold my hands before me. “Is that not a good thing, Reverend Mother? That in these most troubled times, our wise and experienced seeress is finally regaining her Sight? I would think that would be something worth rejoicing over tonight as we begin to celebrate midwinter’s arrival.”
“But of course, Annith. I am most delighted to hear this. I only wish that we had more than a report on the weather and a courier’s tally as proof of her returning abilities, but it is a good sign, nevertheless.” She takes up her quill from its stand and nods at me. “I imagine if you hurry, you will be able to help the others decorate the refectory. And Annith?”
“Yes, Reverend Mother?”
Her voice softens, filling with warmth. “That was well done of you, helping Sister Serafina nurse Vereda. It made both of their lives much easier, and I know it brought the old seeress much comfort.”
“It did?” I thought she hardly noticed whose hand was tending her.
“It did. And it proves once again how invaluable you are to the convent—how perfect your obedience and dedication.”
Words crowd up my throat—I did not do it out of dedication, I want to tell her, but because I wanted the seeress to get better so I would not have to take her place.
But I cannot say it. I cannot confess to the abbess that I overheard that conversation. My need to keep such transgressions secret drowns out the need to deny her words. “I am glad I was able to be of service,” I say, “for now that she is well again, perhaps she will See an assignment for me.”
The abbess smiles fondly. “Perhaps she will.”
I hold her gaze, trying to discern if she truly means that or if she simply thinks it is what I wish to hear.
In the end, I leave her chamber none the wiser.
Chapter Five
WRAPPED IN OUR CEREMONIAL CLOAKS made of thick white wool, we file out of the courtyard just past midnight. Nearly all of us are in attendance, from the youngest to old Sister Claude, who shuffles along beside Sister Serafina, holding on to her arm so that she will not trip and break her aging, brittle bones. In our right hands we carry a lit torch so that we may see the path that lies ahead, and in our left, we hold our offerings to Mortain.
Many of the younger girls carry small cakes from the convent kitchen, ones they piously chose to offer to Mortain rather than eat. Little Audri plans to offer her shoes, which would be more impressive if we did not all know how much she hates to wear them. I suspect the abbess will have one of us collect the shoes after the ceremony. Melusine brings a pearly pink shell from the sea. Matelaine carries the letters her parents have sent her—letters she has read aloud to us a hundred times, as we are all jealous of her two living parents. She is an oddity among us, for her parents—even her false father—see her as a joy rather than a burden and have sent her here to the convent for the opportunities it affords her, not because she is feared or hated. In truth, I am impressed by the depth of her offering.