An odd, strangled chuckle escaped him, as if he’d been trying to hold it in and failed. “Really weird.”
“Is it always supposed to feel like that?”
“Really? You’re asking me?”
I looked at him, and he looked at me. And together we burst out laughing.
This was what I’d missed—happiness that wasn’t weighed down by grief. Enjoying all the moments together we could steal. Looking into his eyes and knowing that no matter what happened, I would always have him, and he would always have me. This was what I was fighting for. This was what we were both fighting for.
I laughed until tears stung my eyes, and even then, Benjy’s unintentional snort only egged me on until my stomach ached and I could barely breathe. That night may not have been perfect, but it was ours, and I wouldn’t have traded it for all the romance novels in the world.
* * *
Somehow, miraculously, by the time cheers echoed from every side of Elsewhere as the Blackcoats declared victory, Mercer Manor was still standing. Even the guard outside our door let out a whoop of triumph, but it was another six hours before the door to the Augusta Suite finally opened.
Benjy and I were curled up on the bed as he read a book to me, both of us fully dressed now, but we sat up when a soldier appeared in the doorway. It was the same one from the foyer—the leader of the squad that had taken Hannah away. “Miss Hart,” he said gruffly. “Mr. Creed wants to see you.”
“It’s about time,” I said, and I glanced uneasily at Benjy. He kissed my temple.
“I’ll be right here when you get back,” he said, and I squeezed his hand.
“You’d better be.”
The soldier led me through the hallway and down the familiar grand staircase. I expected him to open the front door, and I was just about to mention the fact I wasn’t wearing shoes when instead, he opened the doors to Mercer’s office.
Knox sat behind the desk, his reading glasses perched on his nose as he sorted through several files. In the background, a television monitor displayed a twenty-four hour news channel, and I briefly saw a picture of what looked like a bird’s-eye view of Elsewhere.
“This close the whole time, and you couldn’t bother to say hi?” I said, crossing my arms. The soldier shut the door behind me, leaving us alone.
“I was a little busy winning the battle,” said Knox. He finally looked at me, and even with the ten feet between us, I could see that the lines in his face had deepened, and the skin underneath his eyes had turned purple.
“Is Hannah alive?” I said, and he nodded.
“She’s being held in an underground facility right now with the other prisoners of war.”
“She’s not a prisoner,” I said. “She’s my mother.”
“I know.” He removed his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I’m doing my best here, Kitty. The prisoners want someone to blame, and there’s a chance she’s going to take the fall.”
My stomach tightened. “If that happens—”
“It won’t.” He straightened, and his dark eyes met mine. “Tonight, during shift change, Hannah is going to disappear.”
I opened my mouth to object, but before I could utter a single syllable, he continued.
“She’ll be alive, and she will be moved to a safe location only I know,” he said. “Everyone else will be told she was executed. Do you understand?”
I clenched my jaw and nodded. If nothing else, at least Hannah would be safe. “Why didn’t you tell me she was my mother?”
“I only found out when I read your files. She was no one to you until you arrived in Elsewhere, and once you were here, it was safer that you didn’t know. I only showed her who you really were when I thought Mercer was going to kill you.”
“He was,” I said, my skin going clammy at the memory. Teeth or toes. “And you left me.”
“I had no choice. If I stayed, Mercer would have caught on, and then we would have both been dead.”
For a long moment, I was silent. He was right, of course, but no amount of rationalizing it would ever make me forgive him. “I needed you,” I said shakily, “and you were off playing soldier instead. Mercer had us in the cage—Benjy and me. We nearly died—”
“Did I or did I not tell you not to go after the codes?”
I faltered. “If I hadn’t—”
“I would have found a way,” he said. “Sometimes you need to trust me, Kitty.”
“I would, if you ever stopped using me like another piece in your damn game,” I said. “I’m not your toy, and until you start trusting me, there’s no way in hell I’m ever going to trust you.”
Knox sighed, and he reached into a drawer, pulling out the picture frame Greyson had given me. “Here. I thought you might want this back.”
I took it, gazing down at Greyson’s face. No matter how this ended, his life would be another casualty of war one way or the other. “Did you know the whole time?” I said, the words sticking in my throat.
“Did I know what?”
“That Greyson and I—” I swallowed hard. “Did you know the real Daxton was my father?”
Knox grimaced, and he folded his hands. “No.”
“Why didn’t you tell me after you found my file?” I said. “I had a right to know.”
“You did,” he agreed. “And I would have if things hadn’t happened the way they did. But who your father is—it was never important.”
“It was important to me. Even if I never tell you where the impostor’s file is, holding back something like this—you should have told me.”
He rubbed his eyes wearily. “Yes. Probably. But you know now, and that isn’t the reason I called you here anyway.”
“Then what is?” I said. “I know we won the battle. I’m pretty sure the entire country does by now.”
“We won the battle, but we haven’t won the war,” he said. In the background a newscaster flashed a picture of Knox across the screen. There was no going back for either of us now. “We have the weapons, but Daxton still has the Ministers and the military on his side. This is an uphill battle, and I need people I can trust. People I can depend on.”
“I’ve risked my life for you so many times that I’ve lost count.”
“And I’m grateful for it, but right now, I need teamwork and respect, not willful disobedience whenever you don’t agree with my decisions. I need an army, Kitty. Not someone who’s unreliable and doesn’t listen.”