He poured himself some juice. “What kind of guy does it take?”
“Someone who likes to ramble, who feels most at home when he’s on the road. Or in the wilderness, as the case may be.” She wished he’d start putting the rest of the food away and stop watching her. His presence was forcing her to eat more than she wanted. “Have you had any close encounters since that bear attack—other than with the tree that nearly wiped you out last night?”
He finished his juice and rinsed the glass. “I got a strange spider bite in Kenya a few months ago.” He spoke over his shoulder. “Made my hand swell up to three times its size.” He showed her the scar.
“Do you know the kind of spider it was?”
“No. It didn’t happen while I was shooting. It happened while I was sleeping.”
“Were you someplace you could get medical help?”
“Not really. One of the guys I was traveling with lanced it and sucked out the poison.”
“That must’ve been fun.” She nibbled on her asparagus. “What’s your favorite place you’ve ever been?”
He leaned against the counter. “You mean besides here?”
“You like Pineview?”
“Don’t you?”
“It’s okay.” She drank a sip of her own juice. “But I’m leaving here someday.”
“When?”
“As soon as I figure out what happened to my mom and feel Leanne will be fine on her own.”
He crossed his feet. “Where do you want to go?”
She thought of all the exotic places he’d been and felt like a country bumpkin by comparison. She’d never left Montana. “I don’t know. Someplace far away and metropolitan. Maybe Los Angeles or New York.”
“You’ve lived in a small town all your life. You don’t think that’d be lonely?”
She was already lonely. She doubted it could get much worse. At least she’d have the promise of something new and different around the next corner. “It’d be nice to have a change of pace, a chance to meet new people.”
“You seemed to like it here when David was alive.”
“It felt different then.”
“In what way?”
“Lots of ways.”
“Such as?”
“I assumed we’d have a family. This would be a great place to raise kids, but if I’m going to be single I’d rather be somewhere with more…possibility.”
He shoved his hands in his pockets. “There’s no one in Pineview you’d like to date?”
“No.”
His lips pursed. “It’s getting easier and easier to see why you came here last night.”
She owed him an apology for that. He hadn’t invited her. And he’d hurt himself trying to help her. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I shouldn’t have kept you up.”
His voice held a wry note when he responded. “I didn’t mind.”
“I’m glad.” But if that was true, why had he stopped short of making love to her? She wanted to ask but knew it was territory they’d be wise to avoid. “Thanks for dinner, but…I’d better get going.”
Although he took her plate, he didn’t turn toward the sink. “You’re not staying?”
A tremor of desire passed through her, as strong as ever. But she knew she’d be a fool to continue what she’d started last night. She was only making it harder to fall in love with someone else, someone who might actually be right for her. “No, um, not tonight.” She got up and edged toward the door. “But I appreciate dinner.”
He set her plate on the counter. “You didn’t eat much.”
“But it was good.” At least, she assumed it was. Everything tasted like cardboard these days.
When he came over to her, she forced herself not to back away. She wouldn’t look up, had no idea what he was thinking, but it was impossible not to shiver when he slid his hand down her arm.
“You didn’t enjoy yourself last night?” he murmured.
Her eyes lifted, seemingly of their own volition, and locked with his. He was so close. All she had to do was rise on tiptoe, and he’d kiss her.
She almost did it. But fulfilling her desire wasn’t worth the regret she’d struggle with tomorrow—she knew because of what she’d dealt with today.
“It was fine, er, generous of you to, ah, accommodate me, since you weren’t interested yourself. It’s just…I’m a little lost right now. I think I need to figure out who I am without David, and where I’m going with my life, before I start sleeping around too much.” She gave him a wry smile to indicate that she was joking about the sleeping-around part. “But if I ever decide to play fast and loose again, you’ll be the first person I call.”
“No one can make love like I can.” He wore an inscrutable expression when he repeated her words from their night together, but she’d made the right decision this time. She had to heal, become whole, before she could manage any kind of relationship, particularly with someone who could wield as much power over her as Isaac Morgan.
“True.” She clicked her tongue. “Just one of the many reasons all the ladies line up at your door.”
“What’s another?”
Reaching for the unobtainable came to mind, but she didn’t say that. “You know how to grill a steak.”
“You ate two bites of it.”
“That doesn’t mean it wasn’t good.”
“Now that you’re impervious to my appeal and my cooking, you might as well stay over,” he said. “I don’t have an extra bedroom. One’s my office and the other’s a darkroom. But the couch is free. At least you won’t be alone.”
It was an appealing offer. One she wanted to accept, especially when she thought of returning home and facing the pictures of her and David on the walls. Or Leanne and the growing concern that she was drinking too much. Or the mystery shrouding her mother’s disappearance.
Her problems seemed insurmountable.
Because she was too tired, she told herself. Why not check out of regular life for a little while?
“That sounds good.” She briefly touched his chest in thanks. “Maybe we’ll be better friends than we were lovers, huh?”
She could tell she’d surprised him. He’d probably never had a woman over who’d opted to sleep alone.
“That’s what you want? To be friends?”