I looked down at my gut. Probably not better for my gut, though. It wasn't a huge gut, granted, but it was big enough to be on my mind. I worked out when I could, jogging and walking and lifting weights at home, but the gut seemed impervious to my efforts.
It's hell hitting 38.
Nicole skated across the parking lot to turn in the driver's order. She returned a moment later with another Diet Coke.
"How did you know I had diet?" I asked.
"I didn't."
"Is my gut that big?" I asked.
"Big enough."
"Ouch."
"Where were we?" she said.
"You were going to tell me the difference between a vampire hunter and a vampire slayer."
"There is no difference. But probably slayer is the most accurate."
"Accurate in what way?" I asked.
Nicole leaned a hip against my Camry and seemed to consider what to say next. I'm sure the sheet metal was piping hot in the California sun. Maybe her shiny pants were just as hot. Maybe there was going to be some sort of nuclear reaction. Or not.
"Slayers kill vampires. And that's what Veronica does. You know, on the side. Not all the time. Mostly, she's looking for one vampire in particular."
I stared at her. She stared at me. The sun stared down, too.
"You're serious, aren't you?" I asked.
"Serious as a heart attack."
"And Veronica is a vampire slayer?"
"Yes. Exactly."
Another car pulled up, but Nicole ignored it. Luckily, another girl wearing flaming yellow pants appeared to take the order. I could feel the sweat dribbling down between my brows. I studied the young girl's face. A small film of sweat coated her brow and upper lip. Had it been me out there on skates, I would have been a sweating mess, and would have soaked my yellow spandex pants. Probably why they hired girls and not overweight middle-aged men.
I finally said, "I don't know what to say."
"Then maybe you should let this go and walk away."
"I can't do that," I said. "A girl is missing."
"This girl can take care of herself, trust me."
"I'll decide that for myself, no offense."
We sat staring at each other some more. We sweated some more, although her not so much.
I said, "And why on God's green earth would she kill vampires?"
"She has her reasons, apparently."
I took a breath. If I hadn't been given good money by a kindly old lady who really seemed to need help, I would have been certain someone was pulling my leg. Hell, I still wasn't entirely certain someone wasn't pulling my leg. I exhaled.
I asked, "How many people has she told this to?"
"Not many."
I said, "And you believe her?"
Nicole looked at me hard, and she suddenly looked ten years older. She bit her lower lip, struggling with something internally. Finally, she said, "I've seen her when she...returns."
"Returns from where?"
"Doing what she does."
"Killing vampires?"
"Yes. She's...she's covered in blood. Everything is covered in blood. It's disgusting."
I didn't know what to say. I didn't know what to think. I did know that I wanted something a lot stronger than a Diet Coke. I drummed my fingers on my steering. I thought some more, then decided to try a different angle.
"When was the last time you saw Veronica?"
"A week ago. We were shopping together."
"What was the last thing you two discussed?"
"That she was going on the biggest hunt of her life."
Deep breaths, I thought.
"And where would that be?" I asked.
Nicole smiled at me as another car pulled up. And as the car pulled up, I heard her boss bellow at her to get moving.
"She wouldn't tell me," said Nicole. "She never does. Says it's safer that way. Okay, I gotta go."
"She's been missing a week," I said. "Aren't you worried about her?"
Nicole looked back and grinned mischievously. I almost didn't see her grin due to the sun reflecting brightly off her yellow spandex pants and searing my retinas.
"It's the vampire that needs to be worried," she said, and turned and quickly skated away.
Chapter Four
I was with my new girlfriend, Roxi.
We were sitting at a French bistro called French Quarters sharing an angel hair carbonara. My new girlfriend wasn't quite sure what to make of me. I was a mess, and she knew it. Why she was sticking it out, I wasn't sure, but I had decided not to delve too deeply into that line of inquiry. Better to let sleeping bears lie. Instead, we were talking about Veronica.
"And no one knows her age?" asked Roxi.
"Anywhere from fifteen to seventeen."
"And she just appears one day out of the blue?"
"Yes, at the old folks' home."
Roxi slurped some noodles. "And she claims to be a vampire hunter?"
"Slayer." I corrected. "Hunters don't necessarily slay."
"So she's delusional."
"There are more things in heaven and earth, Roxi, than are dreamt of in your philosophy," I quoted.
"Are you saying vampires are real?"
"Actually, I was just playing the devil's advocate. I'm with you. It's all nuts."
"But this friend believed her."
"Like attracts like," I said. "Batshit attracts batshit."
"Did her check clear?"
"It did. I deposited it immediately."
Roxi bit her lip. She was younger than me by six years. She was also Irish, and had the world's cutest accent. Unlike me, she did not have a gut and kept herself in fairly good shape. She was a struggling screenwriter, hustling her way through Hollywood. Presently, she earned her money doing freelance editing work for other writers. She hated it.
"I don't get it," she said, sitting back.
"I'm not hired to get it," I said. "I'm hired to find a missing girl, and that I do get."
"How long has she lived with the old folks?"
"Nearly three years."
"And this is the longest she's been gone?"
"Apparently."
I had only recently started dating Roxi, and already I was loving how she threw herself into my cases, and made them practically her own. She was proving to be an excellent sounding board.
She drank some more red wine. I watched her drink with a mixture of envy and horror. I hadn't touched alcohol in a few years, but that didn't mean I didn't want to.
Be strong. My daily mantra.
I said, "Her friend, of course, doesn't think she's missing. Her friend thinks she's hunting a vampire."