“You should beat the crap out of me.” Ian had the most important meeting of his career in a couple of minutes, but he’d just have to do his best to clean up the mess Smith was going to make of his face before he headed into it.
“No, before that.”
“I love her.”
“Jesus.” Smith ran a hand over his face in obvious confusion. “I don’t get it. She loves you. You love her. So what’s the problem?”
Bethany knocked once before letting herself in. “Ian, Smith, I’m so sorry to interrupt, but Flynn is here.” She shot Ian the same concerned look she’d given him when he’d returned to the office thirty minutes ago. Clearly, he looked as bad as he felt. “I thought you might like to know that he’s already looking at his watch.”
Having missed their previously scheduled meeting this morning when Ian couldn’t get off the island in time, Flynn had shifted his own tight schedule to come again this afternoon. If Ian stood him up a second time, it was likely he’d feel he’d just been jerked around by another investment company. If that happened, it was unlikely Flynn would come back to Sullivan Investments.
Ian couldn’t stand the thought of Tatiana crying over him, couldn’t stand not being there to take her into his arms and soothe her. If he left now, he could be with her in fifteen minutes. But though seeing her again, touching her again, would make him feel better, he knew with perfect certainty that she would be absolutely infuriated.
“If you blow this deal on purpose, if you walk away from working directly with Flynn after you gave him your word, all because you can’t get it through your thick skull that you’re already perfect just the way you are...well, then, you won’t just be letting me down. You’ll be letting yourself down, too.”
Turning to Bethany, Ian said, “Let Flynn know I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
His assistant nodded and closed the door behind her with a soft click.
Smith stared at him like he couldn’t believe what he was seeing. “I just want to make sure I’ve got this straight. You’re in love with an amazing woman who’s currently crying in her sister’s arms over you, but instead of doing anything and everything you can right this very second to convince her you’re sorry for screwing everything up and won’t make the same mistakes again, you’re in here getting ready for a meeting.” Smith shook his head. “I’ve figured out the problem. You’re an idiot. You were a good man once. What the hell happened to you that makes you think this—” He gestured to Ian’s office. “—is what really matters?” With that, his cousin left the same way he came in, with a good, hard slam of Ian’s office door.
Ian knew that Tatiana had risked everything for him. Getting in his face with her questions when no one else would. Loving him when he’d repeatedly tried to push her away. And then walking away for both their sakes when he didn’t have the strength to do it.
The very least he could do for her was not let her down now.
* * *
“Where’s Tatiana? Isn’t she still supposed to be shadowing you?”
Of course that would be the first thing Flynn wanted to know. The other man had clearly been smitten with her during last week’s meeting and he’d only gotten to speak with her for a few minutes. Lord, if he only knew how sweet it was to hear her laugh over a bad movie, or how good it felt to dance with her to the beat of the rain in the middle of the kitchen, or the way she held absolutely nothing back while making love....
“Tatiana couldn’t be here today, but she says hello, and—” He paused before deciding to tell the other man, “she also hoped we’d be agreeing to a deal today. So do I.”
Flynn took his measure. “You look really tired, and with you missing our meeting yesterday because you had other meetings out of town that couldn’t wait, I’ve got to ask: Are you sure you’ve got the time to give to my company?”
Ian laughed, then, all pretense of holding it together gone. “You want to know the honest to God truth? No, I don’t have the time. I haven’t had the time in over a decade. Longer than that. But I’m going to make the time for your company. Not only because I gave you my word that I would, but also because I haven’t been this excited about working with someone else in a very long time.”
“Honesty.” Flynn looked surprised. “I haven’t seen much of that in boardrooms these past couple of years. Until right this second, frankly, I wasn’t sure that I could trust you. Look, I’m not asking you to give up having a wife and kids for me. Hell, I hope to have those myself one day. And I get that you might not always be the best person to work with in every area, that you’ve got a staff full of intelligent, enthusiastic people who know how to kick ass in their specific arenas. I just want to know that your interest in growing my company is serious.”
“It is.”
“In that case,” Flynn said with a wide grin and an outstretched hand, “we have a deal.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
It was a good thing, Tatiana thought the following afternoon, that filming had begun today. Even better that the director had wanted to start with the scene where Rose left Aiden. They hadn’t needed much extra makeup to create the shadows under her eyes or the powder to make her skin look pale.
And when they were done with their first day on set, both the director and her co-star had told her that they’d never seen her be better. Having just channeled all of her pain and the brittleness she was feeling into her character, she was struck by the irony that just when she’d managed to keep her career from going off the rails, her personal life had completely crashed and burned.
After leaving the set, she headed out on foot through town for home. And it was true, Seattle really did feel like home already.
She was starting to know the city fairly well after the past couple of weeks, but not so well that she wasn’t surprised when her route took her right past the restaurant where she and Ian had eaten on the first day she’d shadowed him. Her chest clenched as she stood outside and remembered how naïve she’d been, how easy she’d thought falling in love—and being loved back—would be.
All the previous night without Ian, she’d longed for him, had been so tempted to go knock on his door and beg him to forget everything she’d said about not trying. But Ian, she knew, had always protected everyone else.