The rest of the time, he now realized, she seemed to be on guard.
Yet again, he wanted to reach for her. Not just because he wanted her more than he’d ever wanted anyone else, but because he also wanted her to feel safe.
“Actually, I was looking for you.” He knew he couldn’t stall any longer, but damn it, he hated having to put his phone on top of her book. “One of the guys showed this to me.”
Her smile immediately fell away and the color drained out of her face as she stared at his phone. He watched her scan the story, saw the way she lingered over the three photos of them together, noticed the way the pulse at the side of her neck was jumping faster and faster. Until, in a blur of sudden action, she was shoving her books into her bag, pushing her chair back, and making a beeline for the stairs.
“Serena, wait!”
She didn’t say anything, just shook her head, and he knew from the way she’d pulled her cap down even harder onto her head and tucked her chin into her chest as she jogged down the steps that she was horribly upset.
He followed right behind her and when they got down to the ground floor, he caught the concerned look from the woman behind the information desk right before he flew out the front door after Serena.
“Serena,” he called again, but she didn’t stop walking. And even though all she probably wanted to do was get away from him—from everyone—right now, he couldn’t let her leave when she was this upset. Reaching out, he gripped her hand in his and made her stop and face him. “I’m sorry,” he said softly. “I wish the magazine hadn’t written this story. I wish whoever took those pictures hadn’t done it. And I know you still don’t totally trust me, but you’ve got to know that I would never have tipped anyone off for this.”
But when she didn’t respond right away, he realized he couldn’t force her to believe that he was on her side. Especially given the way things had begun between them at the frat party, when he’d been exactly the kind of scum she’d been trying to evade her entire life.
CHAPTER SEVEN
She’d been so happy to see him.
Ever since Friday night, Serena had been thinking about Sean, replaying their conversation on Palm Drive when he’d wanted to kiss her and she’d wanted to kiss him, too, but hadn’t let either of them do it.
She’d been asking herself why she hadn’t all weekend, why she’d felt compelled to hold him off, to take things so incredibly slow.
Now she remembered why.
Because no matter how much she wanted it to be, her life wasn’t her own. It never had been, but she’d stupidly hoped going to college would be different. Plus, when her mother saw these pictures, she would automatically assume she was right about Serena chucking in her career for a boy.
What if she never forgives me even though none of this is true?
Even as she thought it, Serena tried not to dwell on the fact that she had, quite possibly, already started to fall for Sean Morrison.
For a moment, when he’d shown her the pictures on his phone, she’d thought she was going to start crying in front of him. But then, before she could shed so much as one single tear, anger pushed them away. Anger that she’d never let loose because she’d never felt like she had an alternative to the life she was living. But now? Now that she’d tasted freedom? Now that she’d finally met an amazing guy whose kisses had finally shown her what real passion felt like? Now that she’d found out what it was like to be taught by the most brilliant academic minds and had started to think that maybe, just maybe, she could be like them one day if she just worked hard enough and focused on following her dreams?
She couldn’t stand the thought of having those dreams ripped away.
“Serena?” Sean still had her hand in his. “Are you angry with me?”
“No, I’m not angry with you. After what you told me about your brother Drew having a hard time dealing with his fame, I just can’t see that you’d do that to someone else.”
“Does this mean you’ve decided to trust me?”
She stared into his eyes, wondering if everything the story had said about his being the biggest player on campus was true. Trusting Sean Morrison might very well be the stupidest thing she could do. And yet, whenever she thought about his obvious love for his family, she couldn’t quite make herself believe that he was a bad person.
No one bad would ever love his siblings, his parents, that much.
“Maybe.”
The corner of his mouth quirked up the slightest little bit on one side. “Well, I guess that’s better than a flat-out no.”
“It’s not you, it’s me,” she told him, even though it was a total cliché. “After we had pizza and talked on Friday, I thought maybe we could be friends, but now everyone will think we’re more than that.” They’d all think that she was precisely the slutty model they had assumed she would be based on some of her racier photo shoots.
“Who cares what everyone thinks?”
Being in the public eye for so long, she knew better than to think she could control what people thought of her. But when it came to what her mother thought—how could she possibly explain these pictures?
Of course, that was right when her phone rang. After quickly verifying that it was Genevieve, Serena turned off the ringer and shoved it back into her bag.
“Was that someone else from the press?”
He looked like he was a heartbeat from yanking the phone out of her bag and avenging her in any way he could. Yet again, she was struck by how surprisingly sweet he was. Especially since she’d never had anyone stick up for her before.
“It was my mom.”
He looked confused. “But you didn’t pick up.”
“Like I said before, it’s complicated.”
Serena needed to be better prepared to figure out a way to explain things to her mother that wouldn’t upset her more. At the same time, she also needed to make sure she didn’t end up caving and agreeing to leave Stanford just to make Genevieve happy. Because somehow, some way, she hoped the two of them could find some middle ground. A place where Serena could thrive by following her dreams without leaving her mother disappointed and angry. Unfortunately, where that middle place was, she didn’t yet have a clue.
“These pictures and what they wrote about us will really upset her.”
“Can’t you just explain how the pictures were taken totally out of context and that they made up the rest?”