“Nothing,” he choked out. “I just hate that I’m that freaking turned on by talks of violence.”
“It’s the knives.” I swallowed. “Guys like sharp things.”
“Guys like big things.” Tex ran his hand down my left arm, his fingertips dancing against my skin. “Shiny things too. Ones with dark hair, and bright eyes. Things that have dirty little mouths and kick ass habits toward gory acts of violence.”
“Hey that’s me,” I teased.
“How are you really feeling?”
I sighed and closed my eyes. “Tired. Upset. Irritated.”
“I can get more drugs—”
“No.” I cleared my throat. “They make my body feel heavy.”
“I may have fallen asleep on your chest, my head’s kind of heavy on account that it’s filled with so much knowledge.”
I laughed. It felt so good that the giggling almost turned into full on sobbing. Tex hadn’t joked with me in a year.
A freaking year.
And he was being his old self.
Funny, the gentle giant with killer instincts.
“Knowledge huh?” I prodded leaning into his warm body. “You sure about that?”
“Oh I’m positive.” Tex nodded. “What else would be in there to make it so heavy?”
“You want me to answer that or just leave it?”
Tex smirked and leaned in. “Is that your way of asking if I want you to taunt and tease me or are you just looking for an excuse to run your fingers through my hair?”
“Guilty?” I said a bit breathless.
He laughed again. My gut clenched.
I hated that it wouldn’t last long.
I knew the clock was ticking—I wasn’t sure if his good mood would leave as soon as I was healthy or if I was just being gifted with his smiles now because he was so terrified I was going to die.
With a grunt, I managed to turn on my side, I needed to look at his face—gain courage by reminding myself why I loved him.
“Tex?” I whispered, unable to tangle my legs with him because one was so huge it was probably its own planet, I managed to lay my head against his chest for a brief second before concentrating on his full lips.
“What?” His voice was ragged, his breathing came out in spurts like he was running a race and losing every second he didn’t suck in enough air.
“Kiss me again.”
“Mo—” His dark blue eyes heated to black within seconds. “This can’t change anything. I’m not—”
“So it changes nothing.” I shrugged, even though my heart screamed this changes everything!
“I won’t stop.” He leveled me with his glare, then his lips formed a sensual smile. “I don’t think I have it in me. Thank God the bullet only hit a vein making you bleed like crazy, but any closer to your artery and you could have died—would have died.”
“So.” I tugged his lower lip with my teeth. “Make it all better?”
“Damn it, Mo.” Tex reached for my arms bracing his body above mine. “You’re injured!”
“Fine.” I sighed, right like I ever gave up that easily. “Do me a favor then?”
“Anything,” he vowed his hands cupping my face with such tenderness I almost burst into tears.
“Did they bring my shopping bags in?”
“Yeah, why?” His eyes narrowed.
“Get them for me?” I asked innocently.
With a shrug he got off the bed and walked over to the first bag, I lifted up on my elbows. “Not that one.”
He lifted the pink Victoria’s Secret bag into the air.
“That one.” I suddenly felt nervous. “I bought some new PJ’s. Grab them?”
Tex brought the bag over to the bed and started rummaging through the tissue. His hands froze.
He looked away, then back down at the bag, then away. With a curse he wiped his face with his hands and just continued to stare.
“Well?” I urged.
“Those…” His voice was a mere growl. “…are not pajamas.”
“Of course they are!” I argued with a triumphant grin “The sales lady told me so.”
He took a steadying breath, closing his eyes as he pressed his hands on either side of the bed, next to my feet.
“So?” I licked my lips. “Help me put one on?”
“Hell, no.” He tossed the bag onto the floor. “Why would I put something on you that I’m just going to rip off within two seconds?”
“And you know how I hate it when you ruin new clothes.”
He threw his head back and laughed. God I missed that sound. “Right, I would hate to ruin anything for the Mafia princess. What type of husband would I be if I ruined all your clothes?”
“What type of husband would you be if you didn’t give your wife what she needed?”
“Oh, so now you need me for my body?” Tex grumbled, still in good humor.
“No.” I gripped his t-shirt and pulled him closer. “I just want you for sex.”
“Damn, can we put this in writing?” He teased, his mouth nipping mine.
“If it makes you feel better.” I gasped as his hands moved underneath my t-shirt inching up my sensitive skin.
“But—” His hands stopped. “Mo, I’m serious. This can’t change anything. I’m still upset.”
“So pretend you aren’t…” My voice shook. “Pretend for five damn minutes that your hate doesn’t match your love. Pretend you don’t have ten mil on your head. Pretend I’m not Nixon’s sister.”
“I can’t…” Tex sighed.
He was going to walk away. My body went rigid, waiting for the rejection.
“I mean, five minutes Mo? What the hell? Since when have I only lasted five minutes?” He smirked.
I hit him as hard as I could in the shoulder, which wasn’t that hard considering how weak I was.
His mouth met mine. And soon my shirt was on the floor.
He said it changed nothing.
But little did he know—it changed everything.
Because we were about to have unprotected sex.
And I wasn’t pregnant.
Not with his child.
Not with anyone else’s. Thank God nobody had said anything about the baby, I was lucky they were so worried about me being okay—that they hadn’t even thought to ask about a miscarriage.
So yeah, I was changing everything. Playing by my own rules. I’d made this deal with the devil to begin with—and I was going to follow it through.