I lifted my head and looked at him. His eyes moved over my face and then a slow grin spread on his.
“What?” I asked.
“I like the look on your face after I’ve finished with you. You look happy, relaxed…” he paused and the grin grew into a smile, “satisfied.”
I gave my head a tug and he released my hair. It fell over both of us and, as I nuzzled my face in his neck again, he swept my hair away by running his fingers through it at the side of my head.
“Cocky,” I mumbled into his neck.
I felt his body move with laughter as his arms came around me again.
“I like that,” I said sleepily.
“What?”
“Feeling your laughter. You used to laugh all the time, you don’t do it so much anymore.”
“You were avoiding me, I wasn’t around you that much.”
“So, you’re saying you laugh all the time I just don’t see it?” I asked.
“No. I’m sayin’ I used to laugh all the time because I was with you. You’re crazy, you’re funny. It’s one of the things I love about you.”
My entire body froze.
“What did you just say?” I asked.
“You’re funny.”
“No, the last part.” He didn’t answer so I lifted my head and looked at him. “One of the things you love about me?”
We locked eyes.
“Yeah,” he said.
“What else do you love about me?”
He had that soft look, his eyes were melty and he had his own satisfied expression that was supremely sexy but I had the feeling that he was very alert.
“I love your ass, your hair and your legs,” he answered.
“That’s it?”
“No, I also love your eyes.”
The eyes he loved narrowed. “That’s it?”
“Maybe I should say I especially love your ass.”
I pulled up but he rolled me over and pinned me under his body.
“I just wanna make sure I know what’s happenin’ here,” he said. “Is this sleepy after-sex talk and you’re gonna drift away to dreamland any second or are we havin’ a serious conversation?”
We were having a serious conversation all right. I wasn’t sleepy anymore, I was freaking out and my heart was hammering in my chest.
“We’re having a serious conversation,” I told him.
“Okay, then now I wanna know if you’ve had the opportunity to throw up the defenses or are we gonna have an honest conversation, one you’re gonna participate in?”
Hmm, that was a much more difficult question to answer.
He looked at me.
“I didn’t think so,” he said.
Shit.
Shit, shit, shit.
“For what it’s worth, I’ll share my intentions. You and me, we aren’t practice for the real thing. It isn’t that too much is at stake with family and friends, it’s because I love you. You’re funny, beautiful and you care about people. I like the way you look at me, especially when you think I don’t notice it. I like that we have history and our kids will have a big family and share that history because there was never a time when their Mom and Dad weren’t together. If you were a terrible lay, I might have second thoughts but you and I are dy***ite together. I intend to marry you and spend the rest of my life with you. If that freaks you out, tough, because now that we’ve started this, there’s no goin’ back.”
After a couple of beats, I realized I wasn’t breathing so I made a conscious effort to start again.
Lee was watching me.“Do you have anything you want to say?”
I had a lot of things I wanted to say, none of them I was ready to say.
I asked, “When did you know you loved me?”
He sighed and slid off me onto his side. He brought me with him so we were face-to-face.
“I knew that last time you tried to seduce me before you started avoiding me. When I was home on leave and you tackled me in your Dad’s living room and I told you that I thought of you like a sister.”
My heart lurched at the thought. That had been the most hated, humiliating, horrifying memory of my life.
“I didn’t tackle you,” I said.
“It was close to a tackle.”
Jeez.
Moving on.
“Why then?” I asked.
“Because what I wanted to do was get in your pants. It almost hurt physically to set you away from me. It did hurt when you got that look on your face after I told you that you were like a sister. It hurt to hurt you, that’s when I knew.”
“That was a long time ago,” I said to him.
His hand was resting at my waist but it moved around my back and pulled me to him.
“Yeah, we’ve wasted a lot of time. We’ve got a lot to make up for.”
He was nuzzling my neck but I wasn’t quite finished talking.
“You want to marry me?” I asked.
“No. I’m gonna marry you.” He lifted his head from my neck. “You’re movin’ in this weekend. We’ll get settled, get used to each other, spend some time up in the cabin, maybe go away somewhere with a beach. In a few months I’ll get you a ring then we’ll get married.”
I didn’t believe what I was hearing.
“You have it all planned out,” I said.
“Well… yeah.”
“That’s it?” I asked.
“That’s it. Isn’t that how it normally happens?”
I guessed it was but still.
I felt his body move against mine and knew he was laughing.
“Fucking hell, India Savage wants hearts and flowers.”
I went up on my forearm. Hearts and flowers! As if! I was a Rock Chick!
“I do not!” I snapped.
He was grinning at me. “Yes you do.”
“No I do not,” I retorted.
He rolled me on my back and onto me again. His hands went into the hair at either side of my face and he looked me in the eyes.
“I don’t do hearts and flowers but I promise you won’t be disappointed.”
“You are so cocky.”
“Honey, I don’t give a f**k if you don’t believe it’s gonna be good between us. I know we’ll both enjoy me proving it to you.”
Wow.
My breath escaped me and I stared.
He ignored my stare, rolled off me again, twisted me around and fit my back to his front and held me tight against him.
I expected my mind to whirl, instead, I gave into my exhaustion, his warmth and the sweet feeling in the pit of my belly that I was exactly where I was supposed to be.