Again, she trailed to a stop when Mrs. Byrne shook her head.
“Sibyl, my dear, that is a very volatile potion. Anything could go wrong with that. I took a grave risk the last time and was very lucky with the outcome. And, it cannot be taken in large doses under any circumstances. It could catastrophic.”
“But why?” Sibyl cried. She needed either Plan A or Plan B because Plan C was unthinkable.
Plan C meant that in order to save Colin, she’d have to leave him. It was all about them being together, Marian had told them that and she knew it was true in her heart. The minute she left, he’d be safe again.
“One of the souls could get stuck, forever, in the present, leaving either you or Colin in some horrible limbo for eternity. Obviously, I either hit it right or Colin has no other incarnations but you could have. What if I brought forward someone else, something else? A bee, for example. A samurai. No, it doesn’t bear contemplating.” Looking at Sibyl’s dejected expression she leaned forward and patted her hand. “I’m sorry, my dear. They are clever ideas but you’re just going to have to tell him you love him.”
She smiled at Sibyl with knowing eyes and Sibyl’s heart sank.
“I already did,” Sibyl whispered.
Marian’s face glowed. “Well done! And?”
“And nothing.” Sibyl answered, “He doesn’t love me back.”
It was Marian’s turn to give a hoot of laughter (a hoot that lasted a good while). When she had her mirth under control she actually wiped her eyes.
Then she said, still chuckling, “Oh, my dear, that’s too much. Do you think Colin Morgan would sit and be sprinkled with magic dust for just anyone?”
Sibyl bit her lip but replied, “He cares about me, I know he does. He wants to keep me safe. He’s very patient with me but if he loved me, he’d tell me.” Marian smiled kindly but Sibyl shook her head, feeling tears stinging the backs of her eyes, tears she refused to shed, for now. “No, Marian, I told him last night and he could have… there’s no reason why he didn’t tell me so he must not feel it. Maybe one day, I can hope but we need time and someone’s trying to kill him.”
“They’re trying to kill you both, you must remember that.” Marian warned softly. “You are in just as much danger as Colin is.”
“I had a dream where his throat is slit, his, not mine. And I have these dreams –”
“I know, my dear Sibyl. You’re clairvoyant.” Marian waved that strange fact away as if it meant nothing. “But we can change what you saw.”
Sibyl felt all hope leave her. They couldn’t change it, she knew it, she felt it.
So she had to leave even if it meant going back to America. She had to keep Colin safe.
And even though she’d been waiting her whole life for him, in order to save his life, she had to leave him.
It was the only way.
If he loved her then they’d surely consummated it so many times that they’d have an iron-clad shield around them so strong a nuclear bomb would have left them unscathed.
But they were obviously still vulnerable.
“Thank you for everything, Marian,” Sibyl muttered with finality trying to hide her dejection but she couldn’t.
Marian tried to reassure her. “It will all work out. I feel it. Stick in there, dear, we’ll get them this time.”
Sibyl nodded but she wasn’t convinced.
And she certainly was not going to risk Colin’s life, stand aside and see his motionless and lifeless body loaded into an ambulance.
* * * * *
Phoebe and Mags were happily preparing dinner in the kitchen and Colin was working in the study so Sibyl took her chance and crept up to the bedroom with Mallory and Bran.
With tears silently rolling down her cheeks and a heart so heavy it felt like a load bricks weighing down her entire body, Sibyl pulled out her suitcase and started to pack.
If she was quick, she could get out without anyone noticing. Colin nearly always worked the weekends and he hadn’t had a moment to spare, what with being shot with a tranquilliser dart, a visit to the A&E, being outed publically as a reincarnated knight, getting saddled with Mags, having Mags ask Phoebe along for their roller coaster ride and being sprinkled with magic dust, so she figured he’d be occupied for at least several hours. Who knew how long it would take Phoebe and Mags to make dinner? It took Mags forty-five minutes to make toast, dinner would definitely be delayed.
So she had time to pack her things, pack her animals and she would leave a note.
She had no idea what she was going to do, where she was going to go.
She could stay with Jemma tonight or find a B&B that took pets. She might be able to lose herself in Bristol. Colin might try to find her, he might not. She didn’t know and the fact that she didn’t know made each piece of her shattered heart break into tinier pieces.
Quickly she shoved clothes into the suitcase willy nilly, not bothering to fold them (which was a mistake because they were certainly not all going to fit in a jumble). She decided that she’d have to leave some things behind and swiftly sorted through what was essential and what was not.
“What are you doing?”
She yelped, jumped and whirled, all at the same time.
Colin was leaning in the doorway, his arms folded on his chest, one foot crossed at the ankle clay-coloured eyes narrowed on her. Mallory gave a woof of greeting but didn’t move when Colin sliced a warning glance at him before his gaze snapped back to Sibyl’s face.
“I thought you were working,” Sibyl whispered.
“I was.” His face was blank, his voice was smooth, his eyes never left her.
“Why…” she swallowed, “why did you stop?”
Without delay, Colin answered, “It occurred to me that I hadn’t made love to you yet today and as our mothers are systematically destroying the kitchen by the sounds of it, I thought I’d take the opportunity when we have the upstairs to ourselves.”
She just stared at him, those tiny pieces of her heart broke another time. Soon, they’d be grains of sand.
“You’ve been crying,” he noted blandly.
“I stubbed my toe,” she lied.
This, for some reason, made him smile. Then he pushed away from the door and strode into the room.
“I would ask why you would lie about stubbing your toe but you’ve already left one of my questions unanswered and I’d much prefer to have a response to that.”
He seemed to be heading for her so she backed away. The backs of her thighs hit the bed so she changed direction and scuttled around it.