He knew he did. It f**king sucked and the fatigue slid right back because he knew he had to tell her and he might as well get it over with.
“How much do you know?” he asked.
“I know Morrie got to you and it got physical but everything was all right. That’s all I know.”
Colt nodded and put his hands to her h*ps then slid them back and over her ass and liking them there, he left them where they were.
“Craig works for his Dad’s farm supply shop, out on 36,” Colt told her, she nodded and he continued. “I was so out of it when I got there, didn’t note it until later, but the minute he saw me come in, it was like he knew.”
He watched her lips part slowly, like the skin didn’t want to separate, before she said, “Really? How weird.”
“Not weird when you know what I know.”
“What do you know?”
He ran his hands down her ass then up her back and around her ribs, the sides of his thumbs brushing the undersides of her br**sts. Colt just wanted to touch her, remind himself she was real, this Feb sitting astride him, gazing at him, her face gentle, her hands warm. But his c**k jerked when her lips parted again, this time in a different way, just as her eyes grew soft. She liked his touch a lot and she didn’t guard against showing it. Colt liked both knowing she liked it and that she wasn’t afraid of showing it.
He moved his hands down to the tops of her thighs. He wanted to f**k her but he wanted to f**k her when he knew Jackie was asleep, Jack was still at the bar, he had this shit out and he never had to speak of it again. She looked at him like that again he’d f**k her on the couch.
Therefore, his hands stopped moving and he kept talking. “I got there, he took one look at me, put his hands up and said immediately ‘I’ll tell you everything, Colt,’ I didn’t hear him, wanted to beat the shit out of him, that’s all that was on my mind. He backed up, tryin’ to calm me down, his Dad got between us, another farmer, that’s when Morrie got in, got me out, we were into it in the parking lot when Sully got there.”
One of her hands moved from his neck to his jaw then it lifted and she smoothed one of his eyebrows. Then both of her hands dropped to his chest.
Through this she didn’t say a word. She wanted it to help, he knew and it did, just not much.
When her hands settled, Colt kept talking. “Sully had called Chris and Chris got there fast. By this time I was calm enough to share what we’d figured out and Sully talked me into going with Chris to Frank’s for coffee. I went and Morrie and Sully went in to talk to Craig. They came to Frank’s after, relieved Chris and told me what they learned.”
“What’d they learn?”
Colt shook his head. He still couldn’t believe it even hearing it and repeating it, he couldn’t believe it.
“Craig couldn’t wait to talk,” he told Feb. “They barely got him in the office before he split wide open. Sully said Craig called it ‘livin’ under a thundercloud’.”
Her head tilted and she muttered, “I don’t get it.”
“He isn’t surprised about Denny, not in the slightest, Feb,” he informed her and he watched understanding dawn as he continued. “Says he was gonna come into the Station that day anyway, he’d heard about Denny, Marie, Amy, all the shit’s been goin’ down. He knew it’d come out and he didn’t want that shit to stick to him.”
“So, he was in on it.”
Colt shook his head but answered, “Yes and no. He said he thought it was going to be a joke, Denny convinced him of it. Said Denny talked him into going with him and they broke into his Dad’s pharmacy and got some shit, Denny knew what he wanted, where to find it, had it all planned out. They were gonna play games at the party. He said he didn’t know what Denny took or what it could do, not until after but he reckoned Denny knew. Then Denny slipped the shit to me, Craig saw him do it and couldn’t believe it. He freaked out because he knew if I found out I’d go ballistic. He just didn’t expect he’d have to wait a couple of decades for it to happen.”
She nodded and slid a hand up to where his neck met his shoulder, fingers digging into the muscle, massaging the tension there.
Her touch felt good and he finally felt the tension start to ebb as he kept going. “Once I started to stagger, Craig figured either Denny gave me too much or that this game wasn’t gonna be as fun as he thought. Denny told him the drug would make people high, make ‘em do or say stupid shit and wouldn’t last long. Denny told him it was all a lark and there were no side effects, folks would just laugh, it’d be a hoot. What he saw it did to me, Craig didn’t like so Craig says he stepped in. So no one would see me and I wouldn’t hurt myself, he says he took me upstairs and into Sherry and Sheila’s folks’ room.”
The bitterness was clear in Feb’s tone when she mumbled, “Nice of him.”
Colt gave her thighs a squeeze. “Pissed as I was this mornin’ Feb, I think he was tryin’ to do right.” She shook her head, not yet willing to believe and Colt went on. “Craig says he closed the door and later, when you asked him about me, he knew you’d take care of me so he told you where I was. Though he was a surprised when you came rocketing back down not five minutes after you went up. He knew by lookin’ at you something was not right but he couldn’t get to you to ask before you headed out.”
“I got out of there fast,” she whispered and Colt nodded.
She didn’t need to say more, they’d been there, that was done.
Earlier that night without his asking, she’d laid herself bare for him, handed him her life, her loneliness, the pain Denny had caused. After wishing for years for Feb to let him in, he found listening to her, after she cut through his anger, he didn’t want it anymore. Listening to her nearly made him come out of his skin. But he made himself listen because he knew she was offering him a gift. A gift he thought he needed but realized when she gave it to him, he didn’t want it even though it was a gift he felt honored that he received.
But they weren’t ever going there again, not ever again. No matter what happened, what fights they slid into, what she feared, he wasn’t going to throw that in her face because, no matter how she felt about herself, there was nothing to throw. He didn’t know about the lies, the betrayals, the blows he’d unwittingly landed when he didn’t make love to her. He didn’t know all that as the sickness that Denny planted years ago twisted in his gut that day. He didn’t know he should have never made her go there in the first place. It’d been tough to guide her back out. She seemed so broken he feared he might not be able to do it. He sure as f**k wasn’t going to take that chance again.