Her ears pricked up when he kept talking.
“In a bit, gotta help No with his homework. You want, I’ll call you later.” Pause then low, soft and really weird, “That’s a definite plan, sweetheart.”
“Jesus, Rees, you eavesdroppin’ on Dad?”
Clarisse whirled and saw her brother standing behind her staring at her like he always stared at her. Like she’d been beamed there from a different planet.
She narrowed her eyes, put one finger to her lips and with her other hand in his chest she shoved him down the hall, turning him into his room. Once she got him inside, she closed the door behind her.
Then she turned back to her brother and hissed, “I think Dad is talkin’ to a woman.”
No blinked at her.
Then he asked, “So?”
“So?” Clarisse asked back.
“Yeah? So?” No mostly repeated.
“Dad’s talkin’ to a woman!” she exclaimed but quietly.
“Uh…he is a single guy,” No informed her of something she already knew.
“So?” she shot back.
“So, Rees. Shit. Seriously? You think he’ll be cool spendin’ the rest of his life with you and Scary Movie Friday Night until you get married or something? I mean, he’s a guy. Girls at school say he’s a hottie. Hotties nail babes. It’s the way of the world.”
Clarisse’s torso swung back and suddenly her mouth tasted funny and not in a good way.
No grinned. “I hope he’s gettin’ himself some.”
Clarisse leaned forward and hissed, “Don’t be gross.”
No crossed his arms on his chest and his grin got bigger.
“You know, Dad nailin’ Mom is how they got me and you.”
“Ick! Don’t be gross!”
“It’s true.”
“I know it’s true, No. That doesn’t mean we have to talk about it.”
“Bet Mom’s shit in bed. All bitchy and uptight,” No muttered and Clarisse didn’t know a lot about these things but she still reckoned this was true. This was because their Mom was bitchy and uptight.
Then a thought occurred to her.
“What if this woman Dad’s talkin’ to is bitchy and uptight?”
No shook his head. “No way. Dad is not stupid.”
“He picked Mom,” Clarisse pointed out.
“This is true,” No muttered then stated, “Still, he dated Keira Winters’s Mom before she got married to Mr. Callahan and I’ve met her. She’s totally cool.”
It was Clarisse’s turn to blink before she whispered, “What?”
“Dad dated Mrs. Callahan before she was Mrs. Callahan.”
“He did not.”
“He so did.”
She couldn’t believe this.
“How do you know that?”
No shrugged. “Dylan saw them together at Frank’s. Told me. I thought it was cool. She’s a Mom but she’s still pretty. And she’s gotta be cool because Keira’s totally cool. Not to mention, she nailed down The Lone Wolf and made him a family man and everyone knew that was impossible. Dad bein’ in there before Mr. Callahan is also totally cool.”
Clarisse stared at her brother.
Unfortunately, he kept talking.
“And Brittany’s Mom is single now that her Dad took off with his secretary and lives in Atlanta. And Brittany’s friend Kayla told me Brittany heard her Mom tellin’ her friend she would kill to date Dad. Says she goes to J&J’s all the time just to see if she can catch his eye.”
“That’s crazy,” Clarisse breathed and No stared at her.
“It isn’t crazy, Reesee,” he said quietly. “Half the single Moms in town go to high school basketball games and it isn’t because their sons are playing. They don’t have sons playing. It’s because Dad never misses a game.”
She leaned in deep and hissed, “That’s crazy.”
“Rees, it’s true. Totally. He’s a guy. He’s single. He’s tall. Trust me, girls like tall guys, I know this for a fact. And Dad’s tall. And girls tell me he’s hot.” He grinned and finished, “I wouldn’t know, seein’ as I’m a guy but I look like him and I’m smokin’ hot so he’s gotta be hot.”
Clarisse didn’t reply. This was mostly because she was a girl and so, even though it was gross, it wasn’t lost on her that both her brother and her Dad were hot. And even if it could be lost on her, all her friends telling her how hot her brother was all the time would mean it wouldn’t be for long. And No was right, he looked a lot like Dad.
“Anyway,” No muttered, moving toward his guitar, “I hope he’s talkin’ to a woman. It was f**ked up, the way it used to be. Mom always screamin’. Dad always pissed. His mouth always that weird tight ‘cause he was tryin’ to keep that crap from us. And now we’re not around much and he’s alone a lot. Be cool he wasn’t alone but instead with some babe who didn’t make his mouth that weird tight.” He picked up his guitar, sat on his bed and put it on his thighs before finishing, “And, if he’s got a hot babe, Dad won’t be up in our shit so much.”
At any other time, Clarisse would agree with this final statement.
Their Mom didn’t give much of a shit. Their Dad did, like, a lot, and sometimes it could be annoying.
But maybe some “hot babe” wouldn’t like her Dad spending Friday night with Clarisse and ice cream and scary movies. Maybe she’d want him spending Friday nights with her somewhere drinking martinis or…whatever.
Clarisse didn’t know what to think of this. The only thing she knew was that she didn’t like it much.
No started strumming and she focused on him.
No could watch some YouTube video with some geek explaining how to play “Stairway to Heaven” or whatever and do it over and over again for an hour and have the song down pat.
Now that, she thought, was totally cool.
And probably some random woman their Dad was dating would think what everyone thought, that No was cool.
But Clarisse didn’t have anything to make her cool. So some random woman their Dad was dating wouldn’t have anything to think about her.
No, she didn’t like this much.
Maybe she should give herself an awesome nickname and talk No into teaching her how to play drums or something.
No took her out of her thoughts when he announced, “It’s seven thirty, Rees. Dad’s gonna be hittin’ us both up to see we got our homework done. I already told him I need his help with shit. Do you have yours done?”