‘You’re angry,’ I murmured in a perfectly flat tone, sliding off the stool and drawing myself close to him. He got up and folded his arms across his chest, creating space between us as I closed the gap. ‘Why are you angry, Kaspar? You got what you wanted, didn’t you? A human pet for a bit longer. Someone to torment and play with, to muck up and break like you do with everyone else, because you just can’t take the fact that you’re hurting inside. Just like your father.’
Even as the words flowed from my lips I could not believe I was saying them, but I knew that I couldn’t stop now. How dare he be angry? What does he have to be angry about?
Nothing betrayed his emotions but the cool emerald of his eyes, frustratingly unaffected. His gaze followed me as I stopped with my face level to his chest, looking down and perceiving me through a gaze that could be used to scold a naughty child. His voice was slow and measured, like I needed the concept of his anger explained to me as though I was that ill-behaved child.
‘I’m angry because I gave you that chance, Violet. I gave you what you had longed for. But you didn’t take it. Now you’re stuck here and you’ll come to regret it—’
‘I won’t—’
‘You will. But you’ve blown it now; you know that, don’t you? That was your purpose: to remain human. But you’ve lost that now, so it’s when not if.’ He shook his head. ‘I just don’t know what to think of you now.’
I stood on my tip toes, drawing myself up to my full height and refusing to be intimidated by the eyes that were now flashing red.
‘That is not true! At least I’m not as cruel as you. I’ve never known what to think of you. One minute you care and the next you hate me. Make your bloody mind up like I did!’
I turned away but he caught me, grabbing my shoulders and whipping me back around.
‘At least I have good reason to be like I am. You don’t. Why did you choose to stay?’
I narrowed my eyes. ‘Why do you care?’
‘Why shouldn’t I care?’
‘Fine, I don’t know why I stayed. I had a moment to decide and I didn’t trust those slayers,’ I snapped with my eyes to the floor, still trying to ignore the burn that his gaze caused, cursing my heart for faltering when he implied that he had some sort of regard for my welfare.
‘You’re not telling me the whole truth, are you?’ I closed my eyes, knowing I could not lie on that front. He sighed, pulling me closer into his waiting arms as I watched his eyes fade to emerald. ‘What are you running from, Girly?’
‘It’s more what I’m running to,’ I mumbled into his chest, his cold arms wrapped tightly around my back, the sleeves of his shirt rolled up.
I felt him freeze against me. ‘What?’
‘This place isn’t so bad. I guess I’m kind of attached to it.’
Knowing he could read my mind and discover the truth, I fortified my conscious, hiding everything he should not and could not know. He laughed softly at my ruffled and slightly indignant tone and I silently breathed a sigh of relief.
‘I’ll tell you a truth.’ He held me tightly to him and it seemed stupid that we had been arguing just seconds before – yet Kaspar was one big argument. ‘I’m glad you stayed, Violet. I need someone to torment.’
‘Thanks. Your sadism is appreciated.’
He chuckled quietly, leaning his head gently on mine so I could feel his breath. His hand gently played with my hair and I lost count of the minutes as he held me there, both of us it seemed just glad that the nightmare of London was over.
After a while I could stand it no longer and pulled back, settling onto a stool. I felt my cheeks go warm. Intimate was not a term usually applied to Kaspar.
‘Will the others be angry with you about the cars?’
‘No, they’ll find something to amuse themselves with.’ I shuddered, feeling the hairs on my neck stand up. ‘They’ll be back tomorrow morning with sappy grins on their faces.’ He chuckled wryly and I was taken aback by his change in emotion; but not surprised by it.
‘And you’re stuck with me.’
I expected him to respond, at least with some witty comeback or snide remark, but instead he just stared into space.
‘Kaspar?’ He didn’t answer. Resigning myself to wait I simply sat as the minutes fell away, sipping on the lethal remainder of my tea.
‘Violet, I have something to tell you.’
My heart stopped. I knew the tone he used; it was the tone the consultant used when she called Lily and my parents to her blank room, or the tone the policeman used when I answered the door to find him with his hat in hand, asking to speak to my parents about Greg.
‘I’m so very sorry,’ they said; as if sorry, lots of sorry, and sitting down and cups of tea would undo what was already done.
I raised my eyes to meet his, fear and dread clutching at my mind, heart and liver, tears welling in my eyes because I knew this was not going to be anything good.
His eyes fell through to grey. ‘I did something really stupid.’ He looked down at the floor, slowly, ever so slowly, backing away. ‘The inter-dimensional council heard how much I told you of this world on the way to London. They said I told you too much and I got angry and told them to f**k off.’ My eyes went wide and I did not bother hiding a gasp. He carried on, not able to look me in the eye as I slid off the stool and began inching towards him. ‘I humiliated the Kingdom and now you pay the price for my actions.’
My breath caught and my chest felt like it was collapsing.
‘What do you mean?’
He didn’t meet my eyes. ‘From noon tomorrow I can’t touch you.’
A lead weight fell upon my shoulders and my heart gave up, exploding, bursting like a balloon; my vision shattered and I grabbed the steel counter, supporting myself as my knees gave way.
‘My father knows how I lust for you. So as punishment he won’t let me touch you in any physical way. We’re the only sane people left here, and he just ensured we lost each other. I’m so sorry, Violet, I really am, because now he will make your life hell and it’s not your fault. I’m so sorry …’
‘N-noon tomorrow?’ I managed to choke. Already images of what the King could do were rushing through my head, sending chills up my spine.
‘I won’t ever let him hurt you, don’t ever think that,’ Kaspar growled and I felt a rush of air behind me as my stomach dug into the edge of the steel, breathing deeply and trying to make sense of what he had just told me.