Home > Lover Eternal (Black Dagger Brotherhood #2)(71)

Lover Eternal (Black Dagger Brotherhood #2)(71)
Author: J.R. Ward

There was no escape for him, but he had to talk to Mary. He dreaded telling her he'd been condemned a century ago and had no idea how to explain that the beast wanted to have sex with her. But she needed to know why he stayed away.

He braced himself and opened their bedroom door. She wasn't there.

He went downstairs and found Fritz in the kitchen.

"Have you seen Mary?" he asked, doing his best to keep his voice level.

"Yes, sire. She departed."

Rhage's blood went glacial. "Where was she headed?"

"She didn't say."

"Did she take anything with her? Purse? Overnight bag?"

"A book. A bagel. A parka."

Outside. Rhage hit the underground tunnel and was at the Pit in half a minute. He pounded on the door.

Vishous took his damn time answering and was sporting boxer shorts and bed head when he did. "What the - "

"Mary's out of the house. By herself. I need to find her."

V went from rubbing his eyes and looking cranked-off to being totally focused. He went to his computer, called up every exterior image he had, and found her curled up in the sun right against the mansion's front doors. Which was smart. If anything came at her, she'd be able to get into the vestibule in the work of a moment.

Rhage took a deep breath. "How do you get this thing to move in closer?"

"Hit zoom in the upper right-hand corner with the mouse."

Rhage zeroed in. She was feeding a couple of sparrows, throwing little pieces of her bagel at them. Every once in a while she'd lift her head and look around. The smile on her face was a private one, just a slight lift to her lips.

He touched the screen, brushing his fingertip against her face. "You know, you were wrong, my brother."

"Was I?"

"She is my destiny."

"Did I say she wasn't?"

Rhage looked across all the computer equipment, focusing on V's tattooed eye. "I am not her first lover. You told me my fate was a virgin. So you were wrong."

"I am never wrong."

Rhage frowned, rejecting out of hand the idea that some other female would mean more to him or would take Mary's place in his heart.

Man, f**k fate if it was going to try to make him love someone else. And to hell with V's prognostications.

"Must be nice to know it all," he muttered. "Or at least think you do."

As he turned and headed for the tunnel, his arm was gripped hard.

V's diamond eyes, usually so calm, were narrow and pissed off. "When I say I'm never wrong, I'm not on an ego trip. Seeing the future is a goddamned curse, my brother. You think I like knowing how everyone's going to die?'

Rhage recoiled and Vishous smiled coldly. "Yeah, chew on that. And then realize the only thing I don't know is the when, so I can't save any of you. Now, you want to tell me why I should showboat about this curse of mine?"

"Oh, God... my brother. I'm sorry..."

V blew out his breath. "S'all right. Look, how about you go get with your female? She's been thinking about you all afternoon. No offense, but I'm getting tired of hearing her voice in my head."

Mary leaned back against the great brass doors and looked up. Overhead, the sky was a brilliant expanse of blue, the air dry and crisp after the previous night's unseasonably early snowfall. Before the sun set, she wanted to walk the grounds, but the warmth coming through her parka made her lethargic. Or maybe it was just exhaustion. She hadn't been able to sleep after Rhage left their room, had spent all day long hoping he'd come back.

She had no idea what had happened last night. Wasn't even sure that she'd seen what she thought she had. For chrissakes, tattoos did not levitate off someone's skin. And they did not move. At least, not in her world.

Rhage wasn't the only reason for insomnia, though. It was time to find out what the doctors were going to do to her. The appointment with Dr. Delia Croce was tomorrow, and when it was over, she was going to know how bad the treatments were going to be.

God... She wanted to talk to Rhage about all that. To try to get him prepared.

As the sun dipped below the tree line, a chill sank into her.

Standing up, she stretched and then went through the first of the doors into the vestibule. When those had closed, she showed her face to a camera and the inner set opened.

Rhage was sitting on the floor right next to the entrance. He got up slowly. "Hi. I've been waiting for you."

She smiled awkwardly, shifting her book back and forth between her hands. "I wanted to tell you where I was. But you'd left your cell phone behind when you - "

"Mary, listen, about last night - "

"Wait, before we start on that." She held up her hand. Took a deep breath. "I'm going to the hospital tomorrow. For the consultation before treatment starts."

His frown went so deep, his eyebrows met in the middle of his forehead. "Which hospital?"

"Saint Francis."

"What time?"

"In the afternoon."

"I want someone to go with you."

"A doggen?"

He shook his head. "Butch. The cop's good with a gun, and I don't want you unprotected. Look, can we go upstairs?"

She nodded and he took her hand, leading her up to the second floor. When they were in their bedroom, he paced incessantly while she sat on the bed.

As they talked about the doctor's appointment, it turned out preparing him was more like preparing herself. And then they were silent.

"Rhage, explain to me what happened last night." As he hesitated, she said, "Whatever it is, we'll get through it. You can tell me anything."

He stopped. Faced her. "I'm dangerous."

She frowned. "No, you aren't."

"You know what's all over my back?"

With a chill, she thought about the tattoo moving -

Hold up, she told herself. It hadn't done that. He'd been breathing hard or something, and that was why the thing had appeared to have shifted positions.

"Mary, it's part of me. The beast. It's inside of me." He rubbed his chest and then his arms. Now his thighs. "I try to control it as best I can. But it... I don't want to hurt you. I don't know what to do. Even now, being around you, I'm... Christ, I'm a f**king mess."

As he held out hands that trembled, he did look totally strung out.

"Part of the reason why I have to fight is that combat brings me down," he said. "And it's what the females were about. I took them because the release helped keep the beast at bay. Except now that I can't have sex, I'm unstable. That's why, last night, I almost lost it. Twice."

"Wait a... What are you talking about? You have me. Make love with me."

"I can't let that happen anymore," he said through gritted teeth. "I can't... lay with you anymore."

Stunned, she just stared at him. "You mean, you won't be with me at all? Ever again?"

He shook his head. "Never."

"What the hell? You want me." Her eyes flicked down to the thick bulge in his pants. "I can see you're hard. I can smell the need you have for me."

Suddenly his eyes stopped blinking and flashed white.

"Why do your eyes change?" she whispered.

"Because it... comes alive."

As she fell silent, he began to breathe in a strange rhythm. Two draws in, one long exhale. Two short gasps, one slow blow.

She struggled to come to grips with what he was saying. And failed, for the most part. He must mean that he had some kind of hard-core alter ego, she thought.

"Mary, I can't... lay with you because... when I'm with you it wants out." Two more quick breaths. "It wants..."

"What, exactly?"

"It wants you." He backed away from her. "Mary, it wants to... be inside of you. Do you understand what I'm saying? My other side wants to take you. I... I have to go now."

"Wait!" He stopped at the door. Their eyes met. "So let him have me."

Rhage's mouth dropped open. "Are you insane?"

No, she wasn't. They'd had sex with a desperation that had bordered on violence. She'd felt his hard thrusts before. If this other personality of his was tough, she figured she could handle it.

"Just let yourself go. It's all right."

Two short gasps. One long sigh. "Mary, you don't know... what the f**k you are saying."

She tried to make light of it. "What are you going to do? Eat me?"

When he just stared at her with those white eyes, she went cold. Jesus, maybe he had a point.

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