Keeping her alive simply so he didn't have to face her death was not the right answer here.
Bracing himself, Manny opened his mouth -
The vibration inside the breast pocket of his suit cut him off. With a nasty curse, he took his BlackBerry out and checked in case it was the hospital. Hannah Whit? With an unknown number?
No one he knew, and he wasn't on call.
Probably a misdial by the operator.
"I want you to operate," he heard himself say as he put the thing back.
The short silence that followed gave him plenty of time to realize that not letting her go smacked of cowardice. But he couldn't dwell on that psychobabble bullshit or he'd lose it.
"I can't guarantee anything." The vet went back to staring at the X-rays. "I can't tell you how this is going to go, but I will swear to you - I'll do my best."
God, now he knew how those families felt when he spoke to them. "Thanks. Can I watch in here?"
"Absolutely. I'll get you something to put on, and you know the drill with scrubbing in, Doctor."
Twenty minutes later, the operation started, and Manny watched from her head, stroking her forelock with his latex-gloved hand even though she was out cold. As the head vet worked, Manny had to approve of the guy's methodology and skills - which were just about the only things that had gone right since Glory had fallen. The procedure was over in under an hour, with the bone chips either removed or screwed into place. Then they rolled the leg up and moved her out of the OR and into a pool so she wouldn't break another leg coming out of sedation.
He stayed until she was awake and then followed the vet out into the hall.
"Her vitals are good and the operation went well," the vet said, "but the former can change quick. And it's going to take time until we know what we've got."
Shit. That little speech was exactly what he said to next-of-kins and other relatives when it was time for folks to go home and rest up and wait to see how a patient's postop went.
"We'll call you," the vet said. "With updates."
Manny snapped off his gloves and took out his business card. "In case you don't have it in her records."
"We've got it." The guy took the thing anyway. "If anything changes, you'll be the first to know, and I'll update you personally every twelve hours when I do rounds."
Manny nodded and stuck out his hand. "Thank you. For taking care of her."
"You're welcome."
After they shook, Manny nodded back at the double doors. "Mind if I give her a see-ya-later?"
"Please."
Back inside, he took a moment with his filly. God ... this hurt.
"You hang on, there, girlie." He had to whisper because he couldn't seem to draw a full breath.
When he straightened, the staff were staring at him with a sadness he knew was going to stick with him.
"We'll take excellent care of her," the vet said gravely.
He believed they would, and that was the only thing that got him back into the hall.
Tricounty's facilities were extensive, and it took him a while to change and then find his way out to where he'd parked by the front door. Up ahead, the sun had set, a rapidly fading peach glow lighting up the sky as if Manhattan were smoldering. The air was cool, but fragrant from spring's early efforts to bring life to winter's barren landscape, and he took so many deep breaths he got light-headed.
God, time had been running at a blur, but now, as the minutes drooled by, clearly the frantic pace had exhausted its energy source. Either that or it had slammed into a brick wall and passed the f**k out.
As he palmed up his car key, he felt older than God. His head was thumping and his arthritic hip was killing him, that flat-out race over the track to Glory's side way more than the damn thing could handle.
This was so not how he'd envisioned this day ending. He'd assumed he'd be buying drinks for the owners he'd beaten ... and maybe in the flush of victory taking Ms. Hanson up on her generous oral suggestion.
Getting into his Porsche, he started the engine. Caldwell was about forty-five minutes north of Queens, and his car could practically drive the trip back to the Commodore itself. Good thing, too, because he was a goddamn zombie.
No radio. No iPod music. No phoning people, either.
As he got on the Northway, he just stared at the road ahead and fought the urge to turn around and ... yeah, and do what? Sleep next to his horse?
The thing was, if he could manage to get home in one piece, help was on the way. He had a fresh bottle of Lagavulin waiting for him, and he might or might not slow down to use a glass: As far as the hospital was concerned, he was off until Monday a.m. at six o'clock, and he had plans to get drunk and stay that way.
Taking the leather-wrapped wheel with one hand, he burrowed into his silk shirt to find his Jesus piece. Gripping the gold cross, he sent up a prayer.
God ... please let her be okay.
He couldn't stand losing another one of his girls. Not so soon. Jane Whitcomb had died a whole year ago, but that was just what the calendar told him. In grief time, it had been only about a minute and a half since it had happened.
He didn't want to go through that again.
Chapter Four
Downtown Caldwell had a lot of tall, windowed buildings, but there were few like the Commodore. At a good thirty floors in height, it was among the taller in the concrete forest, and the sixty or so condos it housed were Trump-tastic, all marble and nickel-plated chrome and designer-everything.
Up on the twenty-seventh floor, Jane walked around Manny's condo, looking for signs of life and finding ... nothing. Literally. The guy's place was about as much of an obstacle course as a damn dance floor, his furniture consisting of three things in the living room and a huge bed in the master suite.
That was it.
Well, and some leather-seated stools at the counter in the kitchen. As for the walls? The only thing he'd hung anywhere was a plasmascreen TV the size of a billboard. And the hardwood floors had no rugs, just gym bags and ... more gym bags ... and athletic shoes.
Which was not to say he was a slob. He didn't own enough to be considered a slob.
With growing panic, she walked into his bedroom and saw half a dozen blue hospital scrubs left in piles on the floor, like puddles after a rainstorm, and ... nothing else.
But the closet door was open and she looked inside - "
God ... damn it."
The set of suitcases lined up on the floor were small, medium, and large - and the middle one was gone. So was a suit, given the bald hanger hanging in between the other jacket-and-slacks pairings.
He was off on a trip. Maybe for the weekend.
Without much hope, she dialed into the hospital's system and paged him once more -
Her call waiting clicked in, and as she looked at the number, she cursed again.
Taking a deep breath, she answered, "Hey, V."
"Nothing?"
"Not at the hospital or here at his condo." The subtle growl coming over the connection amped up her going-nowhere rush. "And I checked the gym on the way up here as well."
"I hacked into the St. Francis system and got his calendar."
"Where is he?"
"All it said was that Goldberg is on call, true? Look, the sun's set. I'll be out of here in, like, a - "
"No, no ... you stay with Payne. Ehlena's great, but I think you should be there."
There was a big pause, like he knew he was being held off. "Where to next for you?"
She gripped the phone and wondered who she should pray to. God? His mother? "I'm not sure. But I've paged him. Twice."
"When you find him, call me and I'll come pick you up."
"I can get us home - "
"I'm not going to hurt him, Jane. I'm not incented to rip him apart."
Yeah, but going by that cold tone of voice, she had to wonder whether the best-laid plans of mice and vampires, blah, blah, blah ... She quite believed Manny would live to treat V's twin. Afterward? She had her reservations - especially if things tanked in the OR.
"I'm going to wait here a little longer. Maybe he'll show. Or call. If he doesn't, I'm going to think of something else."
In the long silence, she could practically feel a cold draft through the phone. Her mate did a lot of things well: fight, make love, deal with anything computer-based. Being forced into immobility? Not a core competency. In fact, it was guaranteed to make him mental.
Still, the fact that he didn't trust her made her feel distant.
"Stay with your sister, Vishous," she said in an even tone. "I'll be in touch."