“Oh God, yes, Griffin…yes…there…right there! More, more…oh God…”
Anna’s words turned unintelligible as she started coming, and I couldn’t take my eyes off the sight. Watching her fall apart, knowing she was letting me do this, letting me take her there, it meant more to me than I could say at the moment. All I want is for her to be happy. Anna clutched me tight as she rode out her release, then she pulled my head to hers for a searing kiss. I started coming as our tongues collided. I could only groan in her mouth as bursts of pleasure swept over me. Fuck…yes. God, I’d missed her.
When the intensity was over, I slumped against Anna. Her arms came up to cradle me, and I felt more complete than I had in my entire life. We would have to do the show like this, because I never wanted to let her go. Not wanting to hide from her or ignore the emotional chaos swirling within me, I made myself say how I was feeling.
“You’re the only thing that matters to me, Anna. Sure, there’s things I want, like winning my job back, but…you’re the only thing I need. You and the girls.” I shifted to her side, so I could more easily look at her. “I got so caught up in myself, I lost you. I lost us. I think I even lost me. Because without you, I’m not really anything. Nothing worth a damn, anyway. You’re the best part of me. The very best. You’re my best friend, and I should have put you first, you and the girls. And I’m so sorry I didn’t.” With a sigh, I shook my head. Anna opened her mouth to speak, but I stopped her with a kiss. I wasn’t done yet. “I love you, and I’ll go wherever you want me to go. I’ll live wherever you want me to live, I’ll do whatever you want me to do…just take me back. I can’t be without you anymore. It’s killing me.”
Her eyes watered as she stared up at me. “Griff…I love you so much, and a huge part of me wants to say sure…come home, and let that be the end of it. But for the sake of our family, for the sake of our girls, I need you to know that what you did—the lying, going behind my back to get what you wanted—that can’t ever happen again. This is truly your last chance with me…so don’t fuck it up.” She gave me a sweet smile on the end of that, like she’d just asked me to bring home a gallon of milk.
Laughing, I kissed her again. “Trust me, babe, I would rather stab myself in the testicle than ever hurt you like that again. I just want my best friend back,” I said with a sigh. “I want my wife back.”
Anna cupped my cheek. “You’ve got her. Now be quiet and make love to her under the spotlight again, before someone comes in here and kicks both of you out of the hotel.”
I was instantly hard again. “You are the sexiest thing on earth, and I am the luckiest son of a bitch there is.” I cupped her cheek. “And I won’t ever forget it again.”
She was nodding, tears in her eyes, when I slid into her again…
Monday evening was the first live show, where we’d be showcasing our talent for the audience, not the judges. I was both excited and nauseous about performing. Sure, I’d done it a million times before, but never with this much pressure on me. My entire career was riding on making the fans like me again, an uphill battle considering how I’d cracked things when I’d left the band. I hoped they could see my repentance onstage, my determination, my drive. I wanted this.
It was a short special, only six weeks, so multiple people would be leaving after each results show. I didn’t want to be let go in the first group. Or the second. Or the third. I wanted to make it all the way through. I didn’t let that desire turn me against my rivals though, and I helped out wherever I could.
When I wasn’t giving the contestants pointers or lifting Liam’s spirits, I helped out around the stage. There were crew everywhere, and they always seemed to need a hand with something. It helped me keep my mind off my nerves to stay busy, so I volunteered with as many tasks as they would let me do. They seemed to appreciate it; they even wished me luck on the show, then invited me to play poker with them afterward. Sounded fantastic to me.
Liking how it felt to be a part of something bigger than myself, I offered my services to anyone who needed them. I helped Anna with the girls, helped the host run errands, helped the camera guys with their equipment, and even helped the producers map out shots. All day, I was anywhere and everywhere. Wherever I was needed, that’s where I wanted to be.
When it was finally time for the show to begin, I was pumped up and rearing to go. The twenty of us huddled backstage and said a quick prayer for each other. A bunch of the crew joined us too, and I had one arm around Liam and one around the guy who controlled the lighting. I’d never felt so connected to something. After we broke apart, we all went our separate ways to do last-minute preparations for the show.
Finding a quiet corner, I closed my eyes and inhaled and exhaled deep breaths. I can do this. That was when I heard a voice full of cheer screech, “Found you, Daddy!”
I opened my eyes to see Gibson running toward me; her long blond pigtails bounced around her shoulders as she bobbed along. Anna had long ago taken a seat in the crowd with Onnika, but Gibson had refused to leave my side. She’d been running around backstage, charming everyone she came in contact with. She was a lot like her mom that way. Sinking to my knees, I scooped her into a gigantic hug.
“There you are. Where’d you run off to? I thought I’d lost my best girl.” Behind her was Sam and one of the camera guys. Gibson had kind of become a backstage correspondent, chitchatting with all the contestants in her own special I’m almost four and I know everything about life kind of way.