Fareed’s dug his fingers into her shoulder, stopping her projection in its track. “Gwen, you have nothing to fear, I swear it. I will fulfill my oath to Hesham. I will protect you, with my life. As for my father, he won’t even think of coming near you once you’re my wife.”
Chapter Twelve
Gwen didn’t know what happened after Fareed declared that she’d be his wife.
Everything blurred before her as he led her to a helipad behind the mansion where a sleek metal monster awaited them with Rose and Emad already inside. He buckled her in the passenger seat and took the pilot seat after securing Ryan in the back with Rose.
She barely noticed that he flew them over the desert, then out to sea. It could have been minutes or hours later when they came upon an island. He landed in front of a house in the same style as his mansion, only much smaller, steps away from darkening emerald waters and a golden beach glowing with the last rays of sunset.
Emad took Rose and a sound-asleep Ryan upstairs, leaving her and Fareed alone. Fareed gestured for her to wait for him as he walked away to get engaged in a marathon of phone calls.
He now walked back to her, tall and broad and indescribable, everything she could love, his fists clenched in the depths of his tailored pants pockets, his eyes cast downward, his brow knotted, his face cast in the harshness of dark thoughts.
Had she imagined hearing him say she’d be his wife? Or was this why he looked so troubled? Because he was regretting it, was preparing to tell her that he hadn’t meant it?
He raised his eyes. Her heart clenched at what filled them. Nothing she could understand. He’d been always near, clear. Now he was as far, as unfathomable as the stars that twinkled in the sky framing him through the open veranda doors.
He exhaled. “I’ve arranged everything. The cleric and the lawyers will be here in a couple of hours.”
Her heart stumbled through many false starts as she waited for him to elaborate. He just kept his heavy gaze fixed on her, as if he expected her to be the one with something to contribute. An answer. An opinion. An acceptance.
But of what?
She finally asked, “What…what do you intend to do?”
His jaw muscles bunched. “Whatever will keep my father at bay. Now I know his true inclinations, we will need every weapon to stop him. In our culture, a paternal grandfather’s claim to a child, especially if he’s an elder or a man of status and wealth, can trump even a mother’s. My father’s claim as king would be absolute without any foul play. I now understand that when Hesham begged me to find you, he hoped I’d find you first, so I would do this.”
“This? You mean…”
“Marry you,” he completed when she couldn’t. “A mother can only gain power against a grandfather’s claim if she’s married to a man of equal status and wealth. My status might not be as lofty as his here, but my international status and assets are weightier. When I adopt Ryan, we’ll have enough rights among us to outweigh my father’s claim to him.”
This was a dream come true.
And the worst nightmare she could have imagined.
Fareed was offering her marriage. But only because he thought Hesham had meant him to, to keep his child out of their father’s clutches.
She’d already known she’d been just a lover to him. As intense as it had been, had she stayed at his insistence, he would have ended it sooner or later. He would have never offered her anything permanent. He would have never loved her.
She’d been grateful for that. She should be grateful now. For this proposal that would secure Ryan’s future.
Even if it destroyed hers.
Fareed had thought he’d already hit rock bottom.
He’d thought he’d never know deeper misery than when he’d found out Gwen had been Hesham’s worshipped lover, the mother of his child. Now he knew there were more depths to sink to. It seemed as long as Gwen was in his life, and that was now going to be forever, he’d never stop spiraling down.
He hadn’t expected her to jump for joy when he’d mentioned marriage. But he’d thought even if her emotions weren’t involved, that she wanted him, might welcome the idea of marrying him, at least see the benefit to her and to Ryan.
But it seemed nothing worse could have happened to her.
It seemed she’d suspended her grief in her gratitude for him and relief over Ryan’s cure. She’d plunged into sexual intimacies with him, but must have thought she’d been betraying Hesham’s memory, and with his brother of all people. To ameliorate her guilt, she’d been promising herself she’d leave, and he’d never know. She might have thought that by disappearing and putting up with any subsequent hardship to protect her child and Hesham’s, she’d atone for succumbing to her need to feel alive and desired again. It had all been bearable, as long as it remained temporary.
But now she’d found out it would turn permanent. She’d realized that the only way to protect Ryan was to marry him, Hesham’s brother, when she’d been unable to marry Hesham himself. This looked as welcome to her as a dull knife through her heart.
He had to stop her punishing herself, assure her that he wouldn’t be compounding her guilt.
His voice was as dead as he felt inside as he said, “I want you to know that I will never ask anything of you again. This is to give Ryan, and you as his mother, the Aal Zaafer name, what Hesham should have been able to give you, with all the privileges that you’re both entitled to. This is also to give Ryan the father he needs, the only man on earth who’ll love him like a true son.”
He’d thought he’d seen her distraught before. But now, she looked as if her heart were fracturing, as if his every word crushed it.
He knew this pact would sentence him to a lifetime of deprivation, but he had to finish detailing it. “I’ll give you the essmuh. In our culture, this means that you’ll control the marriage. You’d be able to end it, if you so wish, without my consent. I’ll also give you full power of attorney, giving you control of my assets. In case anything happens to me, I’ll make a provision to circumvent our inheritance laws, so you’d inherit everything. If we’re both gone, everything will be Ryan’s. If he’s not of age, anyone you choose would be his guardian until he is. This will make you as powerful as I am, will give my father no way to attack you even if I’m gone. As for our daily life, I’ll be in Ryan’s life however you choose me to be.”
And he was done. Finished. She looked as annihilated.