“Yes, and I’m moving back in with my parents.” He put his fingers to his forehead, an embarrassed smirk on his lips. “So much for all my big city plans. I thought I had the world by the tail, but I made a few bad investments and then went double or nothing and came out with nothing. Real estate. May as well go to Vegas and play the roulette wheel.”
Shayla darted forward, smacking him on the broad chest with both hands. “Snap out of it! You’re the same age as us, and we’re all broke. I’ve never been to a party that wasn’t BYOB. You’re so freaking handsome now, so stop complaining! You used to be skinny and weird back in high school, and nobody but Peaches took much notice of you, but now you’re back, and look at you. You could be the mayor of Beaverdale, if you wanted.”
“The mayor,” I echoed, hoping he didn’t latch onto the beans Shayla spilled about my crush.
He fixed me with his sexy gaze, silently pumping me for details. Gah! He wouldn’t look away. He was smothering me.
I blurted out, “I didn’t think I’d ever see you again after graduation.”
He raised his eyebrows while frowning, making the isn’t-that-interesting face.
“I’m back in town, so you can see a lot of me,” he said. “As much as you can handle.”
“You’re too late!” Shayla squealed. “She’s already hooked up. You had your chance and—”
I clamped my hand over her mouth. Who was the one with the big mouth now?
“Still a bit drunk from last night,” I explained to Adrian.
“We should hang out,” he said. “All of us. Like old times.”
I gave Shayla a warning look and slowly removed my hand from my mouth.
She shook her head. “Maybe something good will happen for one of us soon, and we’ll have a house party. We live up on Lurch Street now.”
He licked his lips. “You both look… really good. I should have never left Beaverdale.”
“Hey, remember when you took me to Dolphin Falls?” she said to Adrian. “You tried to kiss me, but I was afraid of that gross lip ring you had.”
He snorted. “I didn’t try to kiss you, and you’re the one who wanted to go there and take yearbook photos of people in their cars.”
“Right,” she said sarcastically. “We only went there to—” she made air quotes “—take photos. I guess you’re still a big nerd after all, even with all that body on you.”
“Speaking of big nerds, whatever happened with you and Garret?”
She laughed. “Wouldn’t you like to know.”
This reunion was getting weird, so I stepped back, looking for an escape route. The sidewalk was all clear, so I grabbed Shayla by the arm and started dragging her away.
“See you around, Adrian!” I called over my shoulder.
“Nice to see you two!” he answered. “We should totally get together the old gang and have a five year reunion.”
I turned, still moving, and walked backwards as I waved.
He looked so cute, stuffing his hands in his pockets and shrugging up his shoulders.
I wanted to say something, so I opened my mouth and did: “Hey, Adrian Storm! Led Zeppelin still sucks!”
Shayla buried her face in her hands, shaking her head. “I swear, I cannot take you anywhere.”
“Sorry I dragged you away before you could throw your leg over his shoulder or whatever was next.”
“What are you talking about? I wouldn’t flirt with Adrian. As soon as I realized it was him, I backed way off.”
“Then why were you rubbing imaginary lotion all over your neck and baring it to him, flexing your seductive neck muscles like Dottie taught us?”
We got to her Rav and she clicked open the doors. “That wasn’t conscious, I swear. When I see a guy that hot, it just happens. My brain doesn’t work right.”
“You should look up his number and call him.” I slid into the passenger seat and put my sunglasses back on. “Don’t hold back on my account. He looks like he climbs mountains, with lesser men strapped to his back. He doesn’t want to date a little fat girl with a big mouth.”
Shayla held up one finger in warning. “Don’t you dare say the f-word about my best friend.”
“But I am fa—”
“Fabulous.” She threw the Rav into gear and lurched out of the parking spot like a madwoman. “Hangover helper? Name your poison.”
I thought for all of a full second. “It’s just fruit.”
“Yes, it’s just fruit.”
She cranked the wheel and whipped us around in a tight U-turn, so we were pointed in the direction of Chloe’s Pie Shack, located at the edge of town just off the highway.
Chloe’s Pie Shack had been Burt’s Burger Barn until a year ago, when Burt’s daughter Chloe took over and tried to class up the joint. The logo features a scrumptious slice of pie with the phrase ‘It’s just fruit’ written in cursive around a plate.
Despite the obvious benefits of having a restaurant specializing in fresh pie made from local Washington blueberries, the people of Beaverdale hadn’t taken the news well at all. They’d already lost the best Chinese food restaurant in town to a fire just months before, and they weren’t giving up their burgers without a fight.
Mayor Stephen Monroe, also known as Uncle Steve to me, passed an ordinance declaring the Burger Barn a heritage site. He decreed it of utmost importance to the value of the Town of Beaverdale that burgers continue to be served from the big, red barn at the entrance to town—burgers or nothing. And the sign for Burt’s Burger Barn, a neon wonder that could be seen for miles, wouldn’t be touched except for the purpose of restoration.
Burt’s daughter Chloe took the news in stride, thanks in no small part to the fourteen percent increase in business that came as a result of all the publicity. She added a second sign for the pies underneath the original one, expanded the barn with an all-glass addition plus a second entrance, and now we have hot burgers and warm pie. Who could ask for more in a town?
~
I did the sexy mermaid walk most of the way in to work Monday morning. I let my thighs rub merrily together, my knees drawn to each other like fridge magnets, my weight back over my heels so that ants could run parades under my relaxed toes.
Charm?
I checked out my reflection in store windows.
I had f**king capital-B Booty and Charm.
When I walked into Java Jones, Kirsten looked up from the cafe latte she was steaming and asked me if I had a bladder infection or something.